Posted by NOTSNIW , Sun Nov 06, 2011 01:54 AM
What am I doing here you may ask, and why do I want to tell you about it? To be honest, im not entirely sure. You see, just the whole idea of me participating in a "sex forum" seems so foreign to me. I have been, and always will be an emotionally driven person, sex to me has always been an extension of my emotional self, and therefore, not a driving force. Don't get me wrong, I LIKE sex, I WANT sex (I want lots of it! Yippie!!), but without any emotional motivation to drive me too it, it wont happen. I know, weird!
As a gay man, this has put me in quite an unusual position. I'm constantly told I need to loosen up, start expressing myself sexually, hook up, get some etc.. so forth and such as. But when I try to explain why I cant and wont, im met with a blank stare. So as you could imagine, given that, my sex/relationship experience is sparse to say the least.
After all these years, im now starting to question myself, and wondering if there is really something fundamentally wrong with who, how and what I am. I've been out for going on 20 years now (I was 16 when the hinges cracked), and ive had two (2) very short "relationships", and one hook-up, which was, well, we just wont talk about THAT (it was a disaster!).
So I guess what you can expect to experience here, is my very personal journey exploring my own motivations for being "Me", and how the perceptions and actions of others impact that view and how I deal with it. But please, don't expect me to be completely serious all the time, random thoughts, nonsense, and generally pointless content will follow just as well im sure. That's just how I roll. I may even bitch now and then, that's always exciting. I'm usually my most impassioned when im bitching!
So, if your so inclined, check back and see what's going on with me, and what ive gotten myself into. I'll try to keep it interesting, and hopefully thought provoking, hell, you might even be entertained. I don't sing and dance though, so don't expect a floor show.