So this week there was a thread on the site that called into question the Moderators and how we fulfill our jobs here, It let me see that a few people (4 actually) weren't fully aware of the Mod role and how we fulfill it, so I thought I might blog about it to give an insight.
I can only speak for me in this blog so i'll tell my story.
As you know, I joined the site in August 2009, I started as a member and picture poster here, then spoke to Q about sending some stuff his way from Scotland (Q if you're reading, I still have it here and I swear someday I'll actually manage to post it all!)
I found some stuff about his family name for him and sent him links by PM to what i'd found, I finished that PM off with "If you ever need help or want me to do anything for you again, just give me a shout)
So a few weeks later, I got a PM from the lord almighty himself, saying he'd been watching me on the site and was inviting me to take a moderator position. Now I know that my modding was very unusual in that i'd only been here 11 weeks, had under 500 posts and had never actually spoken in the shout box, spoken to another Moderator, in fact the only moderators I'd heard of were Jewelz and EMT. I'd seen them around and they were in my mind as the only two. I suppose I was too busy finding my way in the site and didnt need any help so I was ok and didn't need to know who the Mods were. The mods were in Purple though so looking back, I should have noticed
I was terrified the first day, I accepted and Q told me to first and foremost be a member of the site, to enjoy myself before anything else and to never stop being me.
I remember my heart banging as I logged in, thinking everyone would be judging me or something, I was in the shoutbox talking, My new modship hadnt been announced, and suddenly my name turned white! There was an announcement from Q saying that I was the newest staff addition and welcome on board. The people I was talking to, congratulated me there and then but I was shitting myself!
I was scared to try any of the buttons out in case I banned someone by accident, I did lock a few posts by accident and definitely edited some when i was trying to multiquote, thankfully the other mods were great at helping me fix my mistakes when I told them.
so after a week, my name went purple, I was now a fully fledged site moderator.
The thing with being a moderator was, there was no handbook, nothing to tell me what I had to do or how to do it, you see Q was happy to let us use our own judgement. If we saw something shocking ie incest/scat, to ban on sight, if it was just something like a minor rule break, to issue a warning etc. Well I was happy to do what I thought was right once I got into the swing of things.
Funny thing is, I mod another website, a female forum and it doesnt need much looking after at all, trolls come on, get bored and leave, here its much different, because we're a sex forum, you get a lot more people trying to cause trouble.
anyways, the site got bought by Jstar and SXF and we changed to the new system that we have here today, well I was so excited, it was new to all of us so I was no longer feeling like the new girl, as we all had to learn from scratch!
So being a moderator is a funny thing, you get chosen for your ability to be firm but fair, for the way in which you conduct yourself in your posts and around the site in general, you get watched for quite some time to see how you interact with people and you have to be approachable. Well it was like my job in the real world, I was a manager in a business and was chosen for that job for the same reasons I suppose.
The only difference is, being a mod is an unpaid role. Sure you get access to the VIP room as you need it to moderate in there, but other than that, its an unpaid role.
I get rewarded by way of helping members.
We get umpteen pm's asking for help to work the site, help to post pics, help to change names etc and sometimes people pm asking for help with their personal lives. Its like being an agony aunt sometimes and i'm glad that members think we are approachable enough to confide in us like that. I love to help people where I can so its a very fulfilling part of modding. Its fun and an honour to be asked to do this job, thats for sure.
Being a mod also puts you into difficult situations sometimes, you can see people on here that are your friends overstepping the mark, perhaps breaching or on the verge of breaching our site rules, so I tend to PM them and tell them that they need to stop xyz or i'll have to issue a warning. Its usually enough to put them back on the right track and its understandable that things can get heated on a site such as this, and you can sometimes say things you'd never normally say to someones face.
I decided to afford that PM to all members that were close to the knuckle as I didnt want to have to issue warnings if a simple PM would help or change their behaviour. Its not nice to have to warn anyone, none of use enjoy it, so its nicer if everyone plays fair and we don't have to!
If threads get out of control or are heading that way and I feel that nothing further is going to be said in a constructive manner or the thread is never going to return to the original topic, then I will lock it. Thats what we're directed to do until Admin can review the thread and decide whether to reopen or keep it locked. After all, its their site, we're staff and they have the final say. Thats how it should be.
Sometimes we see reports of Major rule breaches, spamming etc, well thats easy, we deal with it straight away. Thats where you as members are vital to us in reporting things. It means our attention is drawn immediately and we can rectify it.
So I feel that being a site moderator is a role that is secondary to my membership of the site, I still post all of my pictures, Still comment on threads, and still start topics myself. I still chat to people in pm's, still make friends and still chatter in the SB with everyone else. I am doing exactly what Q said at the start and enjoying the site first and foremost.
so that brings me to my love for this site. As Mods, we see everything that goes on to keep the site running, we see the things that are coming up as new additions, we even get to try them out sometimes before they go live. Thats the fun part too for me, we get the chance to agree or disagree with changes, our input is asked for and we give it very honestly. We do give constructive critisism, we do pass feedback from members on and we do see the site with members eyes.
I get very upset therefore when I see members openly complaining and moaning about the features that we offer. its always been said that if you have something you'd like help with, or something you'd like to see changed, to raise it in a PM with Admin and they'll see what other members think and act on it if possible.
Our site owners, admin and developers are here constantly in the background keeping things running, adding features that members will use. Sure we all won't use or like the same things but if no-one used them, we'd dump them. So everyone has parts of the site that they'll use more than others. There are lots of parts of the site that I don't go into other than to moderate them, I'm not interested in match making etc, but don't want to see it gone, as others do use it.
I know that it must be terribly hurtful to see a site that you've put your time and money in to, being ridiculed when a simple PM or respectful post in the feedback area would suffice. So when i see this happening, i'm always in there to suggest that members are respectful, to ask for courtesy in the posts and to try to explain sometimes why we can't do something.
As a Mod, you'll come in for some flak when members don't agree with you, well thats something you take on the chin, or you're supposed to, but hey, i'm a human being, it hurts sometimes to see your role being called into question by people that don't have a clue about what you actually have to do in it. its very easy to criticize when you don't know anything about it.
So I ask that members afford respect to the Mods and Admin, we do try our best, we are only human, but most of all, we're approachable and easy to talk to if spoken to respectfully.
anyways, I hope to continue to Moderate this site for a very long time, I love the site, I love my role here but most importantly, I love the members. For me, you are the site, you are what makes it what it is, and you are what keeps me logging in every single day.
So thank you all, for being here, for making it pleasureable and for trusting us when you turn to us for help.
ps, thanks to all the other mods, Tenyn who makes the tea every morning, Abi who flogs anyone that steps out of line in the hotel, Jewelz who sparkles and brings the casseroles and stews, Noxie that provides donuts, Flamez that loves up jewelz when we're not looking and Joker who keeps us entertained with his Afro do and classical music!
14 Comments On This Entry
looking forward to 2011
Being a SexForums Moderator
Meeting again for another night together
A little Quickie in the car at midnight
Amazing happenings of Sexforums.com!
Fantasy or Daydream sex
Need sex now... like right now!
Oral Sex , oh yes its delicious!
- Dominic88 on Duchess has taken a Lover.
- Duchess on Duchess has taken a Lover.
- kknights2290 on Duchess has taken a Lover.
- dutchbear on Duchess has taken a Lover.
- OzzyDevil on Duchess has taken a Lover.
- galb911 on Duchess has taken a Lover.
- Foxy Lady on Duchess has taken a Lover.
- ElVatoe on Duchess has taken a Lover.
- bbfrancis on Duchess on Facebook
- slammin45 on Duchess has taken a Lover.