It's been a roller coaster... went though some real lows, where money was becoming a huge issue (couldn't even afford to continue to see my therapist), as well as a continued lack of intimacy... but I sold some stocks to get our bills current, and even a little bit ahead so I could get the new phone I wanted and she could go to see Wicked like she wanted, plus I started a new medication (Celexa) and suddenly everything is different. I'm no longer even able to dwell on the things that upset me... they're in my head for two seconds, and then gone before I can be upset, instead of settling in and dominating the rest of my day. My wife has been a lot more affectionate and even intimate. We've had a few conversations that revealed some interesting tidbits... one such tidbit is that during her fling with that guy, she admits now that she was out of control - that it could have been anyone, and she would have gotten that crazy. The other thing she let out is that she knows that her "free pass" with other guys is now only theoretical - and she said that without any hint of blaming me or trying to make me feel guilty.
Only one thing wrong, now... one of the side effects of Celexa is difficulty reaching orgasm. We fucked for about 30 minutes this morning, in my favorite positions... and although I kept it up quite well the entire time, I never got anywhere close to climax. Fortunately she had no such problem, enjoying all 30 minutes of it, but we both would have liked it more if I'd been able to finish. Our previous encounter I had to finish myself manually (I've always said I could get myself off even if I'd cum just a few minutes before) and even then I had a very difficult time getting it done.
It's a small price to pay, I guess, for not having to feel the way I was feeling every day. I found one site that said the effect might go away - let's hope it does.