She won't touch herself...anywhere!
Posted Thu Sep 29, 2011 12:24 AM
I'm confused. She says she would rather have me touch her but yet pushes me away when I try.
I can accept the fact she isn't one who masturbates, but is it possible to be so scared of touching your own body? Just wondering...
Posted Thu Sep 29, 2011 12:33 AM
This post has been edited by sultana bran2: Thu Sep 29, 2011 12:34 AM
Posted Thu Sep 29, 2011 02:44 AM
These days I have an amazing guy who has patiently helped me to let go of the familial, cultural, and media induced hang ups. I look forward to what we can try next! Perhaps you should tell her what an intense turn on it would be for you if she tried to touch herself even a little... Maybe explain how damn visual men are. She might not realize that seeing is almost as good as doing for guys. The porn industry gets it... I bet she will too.
Posted Thu Sep 29, 2011 08:23 AM
It could lead right back to that same damn question I've had for over five years now: If she did all kinds of stuff with other guys (on kitchen tables, held in the air, on a beach, against the wall, etc) maybe she has been a "toucher" in the past too but won't seem to go there with me. It's frustrating as hell. I will sometimes lay on the bed while she is getting ready and wrap my fingers around my already stiff cock, slowly working it to give her some ideas but she is content to just be the person watching instead of me watching her. I do this not only because it feels good but also to show her that touching ones self is not a bad thing. She doesn't seem to get it though.
As for toys, we have bought a few together and she never uses them unless we are together. I've been away on a week long road trip for work during her horniest time of the month and those poor toys never saw any action the whole time I was gone. It's quite sad really!
Posted Thu Sep 29, 2011 07:00 PM
I won't even tell her fetishes or anything I am in to for fear of judgement it's getting that bad!
If only there was some way to just let these women free and realise sex is all about having fun.
Posted Fri Sep 30, 2011 06:10 AM
Posted Fri Sep 30, 2011 07:59 PM
I used to feel the same way. I think its because of my sister being raped so I withheld myself many pleasures with sex. That being said....I am more confident and happy knowing its ok to want sex. That I am not going to get forced into something I dont want to do.
So there are legit reasons for being ashamed or shy about touching ourselves. All I can say is talk it out.
Posted Fri Sep 30, 2011 08:05 PM
Posted Fri Sep 30, 2011 08:19 PM
Posted Sat Oct 01, 2011 12:22 AM
As someone said "we are close to 2012 not 1812"
In the last 14 weeks I have spent so much time in hospitals with old people and I have now changed my outlook on life after seeing these people in the last days of their lives.
When you are dead and gone nothing matters so make the most of life now and live it to the fullest, as long as no one is abused or hurt that is.
I regret not being more sexually active in my youth. Too late now....
Posted Sat Oct 01, 2011 07:23 AM
At one point I simply took her hand and guided it down to her pussy. As usual, she pulled it away and said "it feels much better when you do it". So I let it go for a bit. I went down on her, got her worked up a bit and could tell she was heading in the right direction. I eased her by the fingers down to the top of her box and just when I thought she was going to take over rubbing her pussy while I licked her, she shot her hand back and mumbled "uh-uh, keep going".
I paused for a second but then picked up where I left off. When we were done she said "why did you kinda stop earlier?"
I told her this: "I'm 41. We have everything we need. We are happy. I just don't want to grow old or suddenly die without having lived life to the absolute fullest. I don't want to be an elderly couple looking at each other saying to ourselves 'why didn't we do this or why didn't we try that'. I want to try and do more. If we don't like it, fine. If we do, then we've grown together closer as a couple."
She never said much. She simply rolled over and muttered something about her not being the person I need her to be. Ugh.
Posted Sun Oct 02, 2011 03:29 PM
The thing I think is that it is just the way theese women are. Some of them micht change and some others might not. I can tell you love them by the way you ask and discuss of what you would love them to do.
I know one thing: I enjoy sex, I love touching myself, I love dressing up for him, I like sexy underwear, talking dirty while having sex and if my boyfriend asked me for something new, I would definately try for him.
Maybe all of the "taboo" thing is a matter of talking to each other, fearlessly and honestly. I know that you might have tried it but... Flowers, a romantic dinner, a hug and a kiss, could just be the key to unlock heart, ears and sex habbits.
I hope it works...
Posted Sun Oct 02, 2011 07:11 PM
Posted Sun Oct 02, 2011 07:26 PM
To be honest, my husband fingers me better than I could finger myself and I would prefer him to do it lol
You could tell her that you love touching her and you are so happy that you make her feel so good, but maybe once or twice during your love making she could share the pleasure. She doesn't have to touch herself, she could just place her hand or fingers on top of yours whilst you touch her, slowly over time her fingers will slide between yours and you will notice her fingers actually touching her breasts or a finger might even slip into her pussy with yours, if at any time her finger comes close to her pussy, remind her how lovely it would be to also suck her juices off her finger.. If she does touch her pussy, bring her fingers slowly up to your mouth and lightly suck on them in a nice romantic way, then tell her how sexy she looks and how hot she makes you feel.
I think it will be baby steps and lots of encouragement... It wont happen over night, but It could happen over the course of a year or two..
Hope this kinda helps