Would you stay with a girl who acted like this?
Posted Fri Dec 21, 2012 06:01 AM
Imagine if you gave your girlfriend a $3,000 ring, and asked her to marry you. She accepts, and takes the ring.
Three days later, you get arrested for shoplifting a $3,000 ring from that store. However, you have the receipt! The store MUST have made a mistake in updating their sales records!
However, the cop doesn't give you the chance to show the receipt. The Prosecuting Attorney has already filed the charges, so it's not the cop's decision whether or not to arrest you.
Your fiance, who was absent from the arrest and thus didn't hear you say you had the receipt, hears about the arrest, returns the ring to the store, and goes to visit you in jail so she can break up with you. She's doesn't wanna marry a criminal, and that's all you are, you piece of white trash bullshit!
However, when she's there, you explain to her that you have the receipt to prove that you got it legitimately on a line of credit. You know exactly where the receipt is, and if she follows your instructions to a tee, she can find it in your home in less than two minutes. The only reason you're not getting it yourself is because you cannot afford bail.
She listens, but warns you that "the receipt had better fucking be there, dipshit." She goes and finds the receipt, shows it to the store and the prosecutor, and the charges are dropped.
In the event that all of this happened, would you still want to marry her? Or would you fall out of love with her if she wouldn't just trust you that you're innocent?
Posted Fri Dec 21, 2012 06:25 AM
Sorry to say - I would leave her!!! Yesterday!!
Posted Fri Dec 21, 2012 06:31 AM
Posted Fri Dec 21, 2012 11:00 AM
Posted Fri Dec 21, 2012 02:45 PM
Gut instinct on this one is I would walk away.
Posted Fri Dec 21, 2012 04:30 PM
I would want the person I'm planning on getting married to, to have at least asked / given me a chance to explain myself.
There seems to be a lack of trust and that would be a bit worrying for me. I also find it a bit worrying that she seemed soo eager / willing to just end things there and then.
You now know how she would really act in such a situation and I guess it is upto you as to whether you accept it / are alright with it or not
Posted Fri Dec 21, 2012 07:41 PM
Posted Fri Dec 21, 2012 08:59 PM
move on, i wouldnt trust her back, what if something else happens, she'll easily sling you to the floor.
Posted Sat Dec 22, 2012 09:04 PM
In terms of the relationship she doesn't seem to be ready for "better or worse" as you've seen her reaction to "worse". As well, it's one thing for her to jump to the wrong conclusion but all the name calling is verbal abuse and gives you a taste of what you are likely in for. It's best to go with your gut for your decision.
By the way, have you looked at legal action against the store? Their mistake is outrageous in my opinion.
This post has been edited by dine69: Sat Dec 22, 2012 09:08 PM
Posted Sun Dec 23, 2012 08:18 AM
I'd imagine the salesperson wouldn't be too pleased at losing out on any commission either. Did you pay on debit or credit card? They would be able to prove the sale took place. There are other means of leaving financial footprints.
I've worked in retail and mistakes do happen quite often but there's usually a reasonable explanation. Prosecuting a shoplifter needs to be swift and efficient to be 'financially worthwhile'.
And what evidence do they have that you apparently stole it? Without solid evidence of theft then they would technically be taking someones word for something as solid incriminating evidence.
Have I got the wrong end of the stick here, is this an actual dilemma or some bizarre hypothetical situation?
Eitherways, here Is my opinion: spending $3000 in somewhere that doesn't have a decent sales system isn't wise. And paying that amount of cash these days is risky business.
In the eyes of the fiancée though, finding out your engagement ring MAY have been stolen would not be a good start to any engagement. Sure, it may be something to laugh about in years to come but The day is tarnished with the drama that the ring came with.
Posted Mon Dec 24, 2012 02:22 PM
Read the OP (areas of interest bolded for emphasis).
Now, for everyone else, the reason I'm so conflicted is because... I kinda see her point. I wouldn't want to marry a criminal, either. But on the other hand, what ever happened to innocent until proven guilty? She didn't trust me until I proved my innocence; isn't that the exact OPPOSITE of how the burden of proof works? But at the same time, who WOULD want to marry anyone who even COULD be a criminal?
This post has been edited by worldfucker: Mon Dec 24, 2012 02:22 PM
Posted Mon Dec 24, 2012 02:55 PM
Posted Mon Dec 24, 2012 03:34 PM
I once "just stopped loving" a girl... when she cheated on me. Love can indeed be "switched off," depending on the severity of the act.
Posted Mon Dec 24, 2012 04:09 PM
Then you seem to be taking a beating in many relationships....better luck with the next one.
Posted Mon Dec 24, 2012 05:30 PM
...Which would probably suggest to her that a thorough and conclusive police investigation has taken place. Innocent or not, that's a headfuck no newly engaged fiance wants.
If she didn't know about the $3k of credit you took out to get the ring before you got arrested, she probably wouldn't be suspicious how something pretty dang expensive just popped out of nowhere. That is until she finds out you've been charged with theft a few days later.
Or maybe she's one of these women who doesn't like the thought of her partner taking credit out for a $3000 engagement ring. Much like myself, although i'm abnormally anal when it comes to money!
However, referring to you as 'White trash bullshit' and 'Dipshit' is a sign of disrespect. If she's going to so casually kick you when your down then that's an indication of things to come.
Posted Tue Dec 25, 2012 11:15 PM
As to how could she believe something like that? Eh...If I were in her shoes, I'd have it kind of rough swallowing the fact that my bf going-to-be-fiance could be a criminal...The world's full of craziness so I'd imagine she went a little emotional over it all. I just didn't like the part where she called you names.
Does she talk like that with you in arguments or times of stress? The name callings??? I know it's labeled as 'verbal abuse' but I have known some loving couples married for so-and-so years who talk to each other like enemies but love+fuck like rabbits. Only you know how your relationship is.
Then again, if you are already questioning the integrity of your relationship, then perhaps you'd better have a talk with her.
Posted Wed Dec 26, 2012 01:26 AM
Posted Wed Dec 26, 2012 07:46 AM
You didn't say how long you had been going out with her before you proposed.
It almost sounds like she is more concerned about getting the ring than if you are innocent or not based on the name calling.
I don't know if I could stick around with someone like that based on the way she reacted.
.. and you would think that a store would know if something was paid for before 3 days. If there was a question about your credit, they would just give you the ring.