This post has been edited by Q: Wed Apr 16, 2014 09:38 PM
Is having sex with two different girls ok?
Posted Wed Apr 16, 2014 09:20 PM
Posted Wed Apr 16, 2014 09:28 PM
So, you should ask how they feel about the relationship and see if they consider it exclusive. If so, it's bad because you're 2-timing them both. Otherwise it could be friends with benefits where all of you establish that sleeping with other people is fine, which means they could get with some other men as well.
Or just pick which one you think will be better for a relationship. And it's hard if you like them both. But sometimes you have to pick and can't have it all, unless you and they are swingers-which does happen alot in today's dating scene.
Posted Wed Apr 16, 2014 09:30 PM
Posted Wed Apr 16, 2014 09:41 PM
Posted Wed Apr 16, 2014 10:22 PM
You should have been honest with them from the beginning. You should have said flat out, I am dating other people. They should not have needed to ask.
Posted Thu Apr 17, 2014 06:32 AM
Bottom line, communicate. Don't assume.
Posted Thu Apr 17, 2014 06:37 AM
Bottom line, communicate. Don't assume.
Posted Thu Apr 17, 2014 07:51 AM
Flat out answer ... Yes, it is OK. Why would it wouldn't be? Should you continue dating and fucking them both? Yes, why not. Should you tell them about it? You can but you don't have to. There is nothing overly serious going on right now as there are and there should be no commitments on either side. You are nothing but grownups who enjoy each others company and have sex every now and then. That's all there is to it, really.
Thing is, your relationships with these two women are separate affairs which they don't have to know about. If either or both of them want more out of it then they should say so. If I was in your shoes and even asked directly I would just say that our relationship is between the two of us, no one else. If she thinks you're the right guy for her she should say so and do all she can to keep you for herself.
Flip the coin ... how can you tell with any certainty that you are the only guy these two women are dating and fucking with? Have they told you so? With out you asking first? Why it has to be the guy who bites the bullet first? Why only the guys are expected to be open about every thing and clearly state their intentions from the word go while at the same time wast majority of women say pretty much nothing and just keep smiling back as if they were Sphinx? It is not unheard of women to date several guys at the same time and even have sex with one or two of them ... just to "keep her options open". And yes, this happens ... more often than men think it does or women are willing to admit it is the case.
Three scenarios ...
1) You tell them, they are happy with that and nothing changes, you all continue to fuck like happy bunnies. Can this happen? Yes, it can but not very likely.
2) You tell them, they get mad at you, you get called a cheating bastard, and ultimately find yourself alone again. Can this happen? Yes, very likely.
3) You tell nothing and continue doing what you're doing until you figure out which one you like more and make your pick.
Pick one ...
Posted Thu Apr 17, 2014 12:22 PM
Posted Sun Apr 20, 2014 09:39 PM
This post has been edited by sarah121299: Sun Apr 20, 2014 09:40 PM
Posted Tue Apr 22, 2014 12:51 AM
Posted Tue Apr 22, 2014 01:01 AM
If either believes that you're an item and there's nobody else, that's where the trouble begins. Let them both know what's up before they find out for themselves.
Posted Tue Apr 22, 2014 08:21 AM
Posted Tue Apr 22, 2014 04:24 PM
Posted Tue Apr 22, 2014 09:06 PM
Posted Tue Apr 22, 2014 09:18 PM
I really can't think of any reason why would you start digging your own grave. My advice ... keep having fun as long as you can. And keep it as fun ... problems do start when you get 'serious' about it ...
This post has been edited by SirFoggy: Tue Apr 22, 2014 09:22 PM
Posted Wed Apr 23, 2014 12:15 AM
Posted Wed Apr 23, 2014 02:33 PM
I would guess they probably both are making that assumption, but that is just a guess.
When I was single I had multiple sex partners, but I was up front about the fact that it was just sex and friendship and nothing more (with the exception of the one that I ended up marrying and that was a long distance thing.) We talked about it later and at the time he had no expectations of me being faithful during the initial courtship and I was thankful to him for letting me get it out of my system since I was freshly out of a divorce at the time.
On the downside, there was one that turned out to be a kind of creepy, possessive stalker type that heard what I had told him but chose to believe something else. Dating multiple people can be fun and rewarding but it can also be full of tiresome drama, it just depends on the people involved.
Posted Sat Apr 26, 2014 05:07 AM
I prefer to give men the opportunity to run for cover before they get involved with me. If they stick around, then I know they won't be trying to change my way of life.