Should one Settle
Posted Mon Jun 16, 2014 08:45 PM
Should they just settle for whoever shows interest, since they know they can have them, or should they keep to their want and hold out for someone they really are attracted to. Looks or personality.
I am a believer in never settling for something just because I could get it. The other debater says anyone who's average or ugly should take what they can get, or else they're just self-entitled and stupid.
Where are you on it? Is it good advice to tell people to take what they can get? Or, would they be selling themselves short by doing it?
Posted Mon Jun 16, 2014 09:24 PM
Posted Mon Jun 16, 2014 10:07 PM
Posted Mon Jun 16, 2014 10:53 PM
This post has been edited by Virginia_Heels: Mon Jun 16, 2014 10:55 PM
Posted Tue Jun 17, 2014 05:35 AM
Its sort of like owning your first car.....big ugly boat of a Buick, not exactly a dream car, but what the hell, it was free handed down from Grandma. After a while, you learn to love that car and remember it fondly after it is gone.
If you are hung up on looks, then you'll miss out on the beautiful person inside. If a 3 or a 4 is holding out for a 10, be prepared to wait for an eternity. It is not often you will see a 10 with a 3 or a 4. And besides, two 5's make a 10 right ?
Posted Tue Jun 17, 2014 05:59 AM
Posted Tue Jun 17, 2014 09:04 AM
Now, I wouldn't commit to someone without lots of sparks and heat. I wouldn't settle long term with a second best person. But sometimes it beats being alone.
Posted Tue Jun 17, 2014 04:43 PM
There is no reason why choosing a partner would be any different. Problem here is that people are not cars or flats or whatever and we settle for something we really are not all that happy with but is good enough to bridge the gap until something better comes along. It's a different story if, as in FBG's case, there's a mutual understanding what's that all about.
Rob, that is not a good analogy. Yeah, it's an old and not very good looking car but you got it for free and it will keep you going until you get something better. But "free" is the key word here. Would you be so happy with that car if you had to pay for it? Would you buy it to start with? As for that guy who passed away as a 44-yro virgin ... I tip my hat to him!
Posted Tue Jun 17, 2014 05:47 PM
At the end of the day, you need to prioritize your wants / needs / limits. I can understand the physical attraction aspect, and I will admit that I have used this to exclude certain women who I could have gotten involved with. It's all a matter of taste.
No matter what you decide, you must always show respect for others. Even if the match is not there, you should not deliberately put down another person.
Posted Sun Jun 22, 2014 05:03 PM
Posted Sun Jun 22, 2014 10:26 PM
By the same token I don't relate to others in that way either .