l have Been in a relationship for 11 years, living together 10, not married.
So its less than once a month now, sometimes 2-3 months between sex. When relationship started and for first few years was 3-4 times a week. I'm not sure what changed but she has no interest in sex. She never initiates it it's always me. She hassles me when I ask and will use any and every excuse to get out of having sex. I am 100 percent sure she isn't cheating. She says she enjoys it when I ask. She doesn't refuse to talk about it but every time we do its the same thing, I say my side she agrees that we do not have much sex and says she will try and put in more effort in the bedroom and then nothing changes, she puts in no more effort and we are back to square one.
She will not go to counselling with me, I have gone on my own.
She has been pressuring me to marry her lately and I have flat out told her until this lack of sex issue is fixed there is a zero percent chance of that happening. I actually laughed in her face the last time she asked because it was the day after we had one of our talks about lack of sex so I thought she was joking She didn't talk to me for a week after that.
I have asked for an open relationship a few times, she gets pissed right off and acts like that's just a crazy suggestion when I bring it up.
All my friends tell me we seem to get along great everywhere but the bedroom and say I should just get a girlfriend on the side and get my sexual needs met there and just don't tell my partner and she is oblivious enough I'm sure I could make this work and she would never know.
What should I do?
This post has been edited by Rifter0876: Sun Feb 22, 2015 11:17 AM