Posted Sat Jun 12, 2010 12:46 AM
Posted Sat Jun 12, 2010 02:11 AM
If you want a girl friend for companionship and friendship, then throw that book away. Going out looking for a girl when you are hugely horny isn’t going to help. All you are going to do is to scare off any girl who might be interesting in you. All you’ll have left or one night stands.
I’d suggest continuing to masturbate when the need arises, and start going out and meeting new people. Avoid the bar and club scene as you will probably feel uncomfortable in those surroundings. I’m suggesting things like taking a night school class in pottery, volunteering for a local charity, or maybe taking up bird watching. You are not going to find a girlfriend by looking. But one might just fall into your lap when you least expect it.
But again, I’ll remind you that searching for a girl friend with a hard pecker is probably not a good idea in the long run.
Posted Sat Jun 12, 2010 05:32 AM
As far as a 40 day freeze on masturbation, scratch that experiment... you're reading the wrong book. Masturbating, in an amount that is right for you, is very healthy and helps remove stress, pent up pressure, thoughts of getting laid with the wrong person and cancer causing carcinogens that tend to build up in the prostate, vesicles and testicles...so don't give it up. You can back off a bit, but you probably will submit to it sooner or later anyway...so trying to give it up for that long is not sensible and buys you nothing.
If you feel guilty about it...reprogram your mind...95% or more guys are doing it, have done it or will do it...even in solid relationships. Don't attach religious, moral or social stigma to it...but do keep it private behind locked doors.
Posted Sat Jun 12, 2010 08:45 AM
This post has been edited by B A: Sat Jun 12, 2010 08:46 AM
Posted Sat Jun 12, 2010 10:34 AM
try prostitutes. If you are as smart as you say you are, you should be able to pick up on what you are doing wrong. You're not going to go out and do anything about it? Sounds.. dumb. Reading a book on how to get a girlfriend is dumb. Find people with common interests. maybe there's a girl who likes to play the same war game with the miniatures, then you can be corny and have the mini's fucking on the board, maybe she'll get the hint. My girlfriend played world of warcraft when I met her, it's good to be able to talk about a common interest with a person you don't know well, otherwise conversation is strained.
throw that book away, do yourself a favor. You continue to feel bad for yourself, boo hoo, poor me. You don't have to handle rejection, any girl that rejects you is just a fucking twit and as long as you have that mentality, you'll find one sooner or later and it won't hurt at all. I've been rejected so many times in high school, I thought i should try guys instead. gay guys are all over me, women much less so, even still. I've never been hit on by a woman other than my girlfriend, but i've been approached countless times by gay men. ok not countless, but a few times lol.
i've never seen you or met you but I know that you are probably an awkward person. you seem to lack strong communication skills and likely don't carry yourself well physically. be proud, feel like a movie star, even if you feel worthless. Practice smiling in front of a mirror, you'll find a particular smile you like. I'm not bashing you here, you do come off as intelligent, just overcome by a subconscious (or maybe concious) depression. I've been there, doctors put me on veggie medications and I got through it, when I stopped taking them, i had renewed interests in myself. Practice walking and talking, read the news to be able to make some conversation, take a strong opinion about something.
Posted Sat Jun 12, 2010 10:36 AM
Posted Sat Jun 12, 2010 06:37 PM
I would like to think I can actually communicate. I mean, I go out from time to time and socialize, like I said. I used to have friends, until they started acting like real assholes. But if I was to meet you, randomly, in a store or something, the most you are going to get out of me is a Hi, or Whats up, because I dont know you, and we probably, more than likely, do NOT have any sort of common interests.
This post has been edited by KainMalice: Sat Jun 12, 2010 06:40 PM
Posted Sun Jun 13, 2010 10:35 PM
Masturbation is normal and healthy. Your problem won't be solved by not masturbating. Or by masturbating, for that matter. I don't think masturbation has anything to do with wanting a girlfriend or finding someone with whom you have common interests, etc. Throw that book out the window.
I totally agree that you need to decide how much and how often you personally need to masturbate. Feeling horny? Do it. Not feeling horny? Don't do it. Feeling really horny? You might do it more than once in a day.
But not doing it at all isn't going to help you meet people.
You say that you have a big ego - but you don't sound like you're confident around people, especially women. I'm sure you're intelligent, but you also seem to write off most people before you even talk to them because you assume that they don't have interests in common with you. But you don't give them more than a passing glance because of that assumption.
I definitely wouldn't recommend walking up to random women and saying to them, "Hey, you wanna have random sex with me?" You'll most likely get shut down. If any guy ever used that as an opening line with me, I'd flat out tell him no and walk away. Doing that is probably worse for your confidence and doesn't seem like it would help at all. Plus, an opening line like that doesn't show good social skills or respect for the woman you're approaching.
Posted Mon Jun 14, 2010 12:38 AM
Most women don't want a guy who comes on too strong sexually right away (sometimes this isn't true, but almost always it is). I'd masturbate as usual, whatever you gotta do to keep it off your mind while forming friendships.
All the good advice has been said, I think. You need to join more clubs. Maybe more war game clubs? Something with chicks in it. If you meet enough girls, get to know them, then eventually one is going to suck your dick.