OK, masturbation question for the girls.
Posted Fri Dec 29, 2006 07:51 AM
I swear my X G/f would rather play with her vibrator or finger herself than fuck me. She even seemed to prefer this over me giving her oral sex. I would have been more than happy to preformed oral on her every time she wanted it if it would have led to intercorse.
She had this thing where she liked me to pull on one of her nipples and have me suck on the other one while she fingered herself. Well that's fine but the problem was we did this more than we actually had intercorse. Like three to one.
She would use excuses for not wanting intercorse like she was obvolating and was afraid of getting pregnant. Even though I used a condom.
What would really piss me off was she would con me into doing this by telling me she would suck me off afterwards. Then after she got off she wouldn't return the favor. Selfish bitch. That's one reason why I'm no longer with her.
We also only had sex when she wanted it. Which was about four times a month. Well four times a month with me. The rest of the time she would play with her vibrator. Then when I came over she would say she didn't want to do it because she had played with it earlier in the day and wasn't horny.
Most of the time that she wanted intercorse was the day after her period stopped. And maybe the day after that. We never had sex during her period. She thought I might get grossed out but I never got the opportunity to find out if I thought it was gross or not.
It wasn't that I couldn't satisfy her through intercorse. She made comments that my penis was just the right size. Large enough to satisify her but not too large to hurt her. And it wasn't that I went before she did. She always organsmed before I did. So I don't know what was up with that.
So a couple of questions.
Are any of you ladies prefer to play with yourself more than intercorse? Simply because you like it more. Not that your man can't satisfy you otherwise.
Second. I know condoms are not 100% fullproof. They can leak and you should pull out anyway before dropping a load even when wearing one but are you really more likely to get pregant say halfway between periods than the day after you stop your period? Even if you are wearing a condom?
Or was she just trying to blow smoke up my ass?
Does that last question make any sense?
Posted Fri Dec 29, 2006 08:57 AM
Also, you should note that the majority of women don't cum through simple intercourse. The clitoris is outside of the vagina and isn't typically stimulated enough in the physical act of intercourse. But that doesn't mean it's fair to deny a man his pleasure in intercourse. She should have been more giving. And it sounds like you needed to communicate with her more on this. Did you ask her if you could try having intercourse before she decided for you that it would be gross (during her period)? Honestly, I can understand her not feeling too attractive at that time. Perhaps she used bad reasoning to avoid doing that, but I imagine it was a simple matter of feeling messy and not attractive.
It's logical that a woman is horniest at the time of ovulation. It makes sense for the pure reason of procreation.
I wouldn't say she was trying to "blow smoke up your ass", but she wasn't being entirely honest about her motives. Perhaps she thought that by telling you her reasons were "for you" she felt she was being generous.
Just my 2 cents.
Posted Fri Dec 29, 2006 09:36 AM
She was indeed a selfish bitch.
And to answer your question, no way in hell would I prefer masturbating over sex. Also, there is the rythm method for birth control. If you are REALLY scared a condom won't work, there are 10 days you don't have sex (the sperm lives 3 days, an egg 2) and a woman usually ovulates 14 days after the start of her period. So yes, she was right about that (when you get pregnant). And statisically, a condomo is only 50% effective.
But see, she never returned the favor . You say you are with a new g/f. I hope she is much more giving than the last one.
Posted Fri Dec 29, 2006 01:34 PM
Posted Fri Dec 29, 2006 03:24 PM
Posted Fri Dec 29, 2006 05:28 PM
I gave up on trying to be domineering.
I've said this before but I really thought it was some sort of power trip with her. I could not *really* initiated sex. Defenitly not verbally. That would definetely not get me any sex. She said if I asked for it, it made her feel uncomfortable like she was being forced.
I had wondered if she may have been raped when she was a child but she said she didn't loose her virginity until she was 23. And she got pregnant. Also strange is she told me she didn't have an orgasim until she was 28. I don't know if this was through intercorse or masturbation. That's a bit hard to understand but I'm not a women. I still wonder if she may have been raped as a child and just told me otherwise.
As far as rubbing, kissing. I can't say for sure if this worked because sometimes it would lead to sex but other times she would get really pissed off and just push my hand away and tell me I was groping her. So I suspect the times I did get sex was when she was just plain horny to begin with.
When sex did occur she had to have total control in the bedroom. Except I had to do all the work. Do this, do that. Meaning she told me what she wanted me to do. If I asked for a blowjob she wouldn't do it. That had to be her decision.
One time we did a 69. I had been asking for this for some time. Except it was her decision not mine. But she wanted me to get on top and for me to move myself up and down! How awkard is that?
I told her several times that I wanted her to get her to get on top and fuck me but she never would. Well one time she got on top of me but just went up and down a couple of times. Not like I wanted it.
I wanted to try different sexual positions to see what would work the best but we just ended up doing it doggy style. This was even a bit awkard because I'm close to 6' tall and she was closer to 5' tall. So the difference in the lengths of our legs made it a bit hard to have sex. But I found putting a pillow under her knees would help raise her up to my level.
I can understand if a women is not horny. If she is tired and not in the mood but there were times where she wasn't tired but just not in the mood and there didn't seem to be anyting to change it. So I tried to get her to do stuff to me. Like we bought this strap on which I really wanted her to use on me but we never got around to using it. It was like, "If I'm not in the mood, then you shouldn't be either".
I think my main problem is she was the only person I've ever been with. So I really don't know what to expect otherwise. She was aware of this before we had sex and I tend to think that she used this to her advantage. Trying to make me think that if there was something I didn't like about our sex life, then to just get over it because either all women were this way and don't bother trying to find someone else that might be better.
I have not had sex with my new girlfriend. I've just met her so I don't know much about what she is like in bed. Hopefully nothing like my X!
I love sex and would rather die if I couldn't enjoy it. I want a women who loves it as much as I do. I wouldn't want someone who just gives it to me just to make me happy. That's no fun. Like jerks who get their jollies and don't care if the women has an orgasim or not. I want to do whatever it takes to please a women but I want the same in return.
Posted Fri Dec 29, 2006 05:37 PM
I would often have my ex suck on my nipples while I fingered my clit. Those were the best orgasms. He would go down on me and I would orgasm but they still weren't as good as the ones I gave myself. But I would always reciprocate the favor by going down on him. Sometimes we would have sex after he got me off, but I preferred enjoying my orgasm. Also, after an orgasm, my vagina passage clenches shut and sex almost hurts. Not sure exactly why or how it happens. So we would always have to wait.
Anyway, I guess my point is that it doesn't matter whether she preferred sex or masturbation. She sounds very selfish in that she doesn't reciprocate sexual favors. While for pleasure's sake I enjoy the orgasms I give myself better, I still would never let it overrun my sex life. Sex is all encompassing and involves much more passion and intimacy. It should never be looked at as just as pleasure for one own's self.
Posted Fri Dec 29, 2006 06:04 PM
Posted Sat Dec 30, 2006 02:27 AM
She's been long gone for about two months. Actually she broke up with me which was the way I wanted it to happen anyway. Well she just stopped calling me at first because she got mad at me then we broke up. I don't like being the bad guy all the time.
I was going to tell her if she wanted this relationship to work out either stop making demands or compromise on a few things. Even though deep down inside I knew we were not going to change each other.
We have talked a couple of times over the phone since then and decided there were no hard feelings and we were just not right for each other despite the fact we did have a good relationship. I told her I did not want her to hate me and I did not hate her. We were together for almost a year. We never really argued but I kept allot to myself simply because I don't like confrontations.
This thread should probably be listed under "relationships" but we both had issues. Her issue was she was the type of person who did not like being alone even though she had a kid to keep her company when he was not in school. She did not work or have a hobby other than taking care of her 12 year old son. She was a widow and collected survivor benefits.
I have to work, have a car hobby and other responsiblities like cleaning, shopping, etc. She could not say anything about me working but she did not like the fact that after working 12 hour shifts (days and nights) I'd stop by my parents house to eat then went home and crashed. Rather than coming over her house.
I am physically and mentally exhausted when I get off from work I like to crash and not use my brain. She wanted me to come over after I got off work and spend all my offdays with her.
I on the other hand grew up an only child and being alone does not bother me. I don't need someone around me at all times to feel secure. Alone meaning I can spend all day in my garage and not see a soul and it doesn't bother me.
My issue was I wanted more sex. The days we were together I felt like we should have had it. Not just four times a month. I felt like even though she liked sex, she used it as a pawn to get me to spend more time with her. Simply because she was so insecure.
She even told me if I wanted more sex then I needed to spend more time with her. Which I didn't think was fair because I was doing the best I could do.
I now have someone new in my life and I'm ready to move on. This girl is everything my X was not. She is totally different but have no idea what she is like in bed. She smokes so I no longer have someone nagging me about that. She doesn't talk constantly during movies so that is a plus. She has a really good relationship with her parents like I do so I don't have someone making me feel guilty about eating dinner at my parents or giving a shit about what's going on in my life.