Posted Thu Mar 24, 2011 04:51 PM
"Sex relieves tension. Love causes it." - Woody Allen
"The world will look up and shout 'save us.' And I'll whisper.......no." - Rorschach, Watchmen
Posted Thu Mar 24, 2011 05:08 PM
This post has been edited by WeeWilly: Thu Mar 24, 2011 05:08 PM
Posted Thu Mar 24, 2011 05:23 PM
Music should strike fire from the heart of man, and bring tears from the eyes of woman.-Beethoven
It's not the size of the ship; it's the size of the waves.-- Little Richard
Man who go to bed horny wake up with solution in hand.-me right now!
Posted Thu Mar 24, 2011 05:36 PM
I can resist everything but temptation - Oscar Wilde
I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it. - Attributed to Voltaire
I aim to misbehave - Mal Reynolds
We're only immortal for a limited time - Neal Peart
Posted Thu Mar 24, 2011 05:40 PM
"I didn't do it! Wait... what is IT exactly?" - Me.
"Sorry officer, I was just.. so drunk... I just couldn't keep my pants on when I saw those nuns standing there..." - me getting arrested for mooning an entire convent of nuns while in Seminary (yes, I used to be an ordained minister...)
"Son, you're in jail for your own protection right now. Those nuns are looking for you with diamond crusted rulers. Also, what the hell kind of pastor moons nuns?! What's wrong with you?!" - answer to me asking why I was in jail and hungover after mooning those nuns.
"I'll save you Pete!" - trying to save a friend that pulled his wife, ass backwards, into the lavatory trench during a WWII reenactment. I couldn't save him before his wife pushed his face into the after effects of chili night... but I could take blackmail photos...
"And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O LORD, bless this Thy hand grenade that with it Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits, in Thy mercy." And the LORD did grin and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats and large chu... And the LORD spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it. Amen." - Armaments, Chapter 2, Verses 9-21
Posted Fri Mar 25, 2011 11:39 PM
I love big tits -- Benny Hilll
Posted Fri Mar 25, 2011 11:51 PM
Posted Sat Mar 26, 2011 07:23 AM
Do you work at subway? Because you give me a foot long.
Cracks me up every time.
Posted Sat Mar 26, 2011 04:24 PM
Not sure who said it.
Posted Sat Mar 26, 2011 04:42 PM
Posted Sat Mar 26, 2011 05:20 PM
all you need is in your soul
"He who has a WHY to live can bear with almost any How." Nietzche
Be more concerned about your character than your reputation, your reputation is merely who people think you are but your character is who you truly are !
Posted Sat Mar 26, 2011 05:31 PM
Volvo, Video, Velcro (I came, I saw, I stuck around)
Posted Sun Mar 27, 2011 10:51 AM
This post has been edited by B A: Sun Mar 27, 2011 10:52 AM
Posted Sun Mar 27, 2011 12:53 PM
Support genetic engineering, natural selection isn't working
Posted Tue Mar 29, 2011 08:35 PM