[Curiousmama]

Hi all.

I am away from my bf for 3months ive stopped having sex. no sex for 3months, does make me less sexual?


I am very sexual person. (Im not gonna lie, I love being horny ) but now watching porn doesnt do anything to me. is it something wrong with me?

[stevefkbuddy]

make your own porn! that will heat you up

[NOLAdoesitBest]

if you dont have a toy it might help, look at pictures or try phone sex with him. anything yo make you think about how much you love him will bring it back.

[gotaninsanepain]

maybe try some different categories...you might find something your into and never knew...

[WeeWilly]

You dont need to be away from your SO for a period of time for porn not to do it anymore for you.

I'm with my SO for this last 12 years and we have sex regularly, but even an hour or so after a quickie fuck, i'm horny again, depending on the mood im in. I could have sex again and again and again, (giving me time to replenish my soldiers of course).

Watching porn doesnt seem to do it for me either, unless i'm real horny.

I could watch an hour or 2 of porn that has real porn actors in it and it wouldnt get me up.

I've seen it all before.

What does get me going is watching some "REAL" homemade amater sex videos made by real couple's.

Them type's of videos or clips gets my balls ready to fuck all around me.

There's nothing wrong with you, you just need to see more to get you real horny.

[EvilPsychologist]

Well there is a condition known as being desensitized (also known as "flooding" in the field of psychology). Basically, you've been stimulated by the same thing over and over and you're not as stimulated by it anymore. You've built up something of an immunity to the specific neurotransmitter associated with that stimulus, and the best thing to do is to stop using said stimulus for a period of time, during which your resistance will slowly lower itself and you'll be able to get horny from porn again.

[grinreaper6]

yeah you just need to find another kind of porn to feel that way again

[tonyp]

Parannoyed hit the nail on the head. There is a ladder effect with porno. The more you use a particualr sexy stimulus, the less the impact it will have on you. So as a result you up the ante and seek more provocative material which in turn ceases to work after a while and so on and so on. Eventually it all seems boring.

Iused to really be into vhs and dvd 's. I still have some but by and large they are all boring to me now. I haven't really watched any porn in a long time. Occassionally I will pull a n old favorite out and watch it for a while.

Backing off and not using it is one way of dealing with it. Another alternative is doing things (safe things) that excite you. Leave the imaginary and engage yourself in a RL experience. For me it is writing about my own sex life or chatting with friends here about sexyt things. Just be safe.

Tenyn

[KellsMor]

Everyone will go through stages of how much and which kind of porn turns them on, you might try the cams in the chat room or even going old school and treating yourself to a long hot bath with oil beads then an evening alone in bed with just your imagination to try to get a fire lit. Often times finding new techniques will help like fingering your ass or using different clitoral pressures or vibrations, exploring your g-spot, something you haven't done in a while or at all.
Once in the bedroom I personally suggest either candles(or even better total darkness) with any toys you can find(dont' forget oral toys, they can light a spark too) and then oiling down your body, all of it. Head to toe with your fave lotion or oil or even something healthy for your body that you may have on hand like olive oil. And just play, in the dark, until you find a spark.
{Don't forget to put a towel or two down or even under the bedsheet to soak up the oil )

I don't care what anyone says, just the stress from being away from your bf for 3 months could be causing the issue. If at all possible get a massage or series of full-body massages.

[stevex]

If you've lost all desire maybe you're a basically other-centered person and a touch depressed by your three-month separation?

When I've been outside a relationship mass-produced porn quickly comes to seem like commercial 'product', a mockery of what I desire. I'm much more moved by erotica made by real people - rather like the blogs and pics we see here on SF:)

So I don't think going off porn suggests there's something wrong with you - maybe it's just time for a more wholesome erotica:)

[paris75]

Curiousmama, on Fri Mar 25, 2011 12:55 PM, said:

Hi all.

I am away from my bf for 3months ive stopped having sex. no sex for 3months, does make me less sexual?


I am very sexual person. (Im not gonna lie, I love being horny ) but now watching porn doesnt do anything to me. is it something wrong with me?

It is strange to know that you don't have sex for the last three month,and you said you sex horny,sure it is wrong you don't have stop like this you have some years to have this opportunity so avail it if the sex is dead it makes to sick.The more you do the more you come.

[kazantzakis]

Thinking that you may need a constructive hobby...something you like to do...to divert the energy....to focus on. Sex is great,even fabulous, no question....however, it can be here and gone..even in the best of relationships...sometimes leaving a feeling of emptiness, insecurity..and of being lonely. You can satisfy the physical part, but satisfying the emotions is much more difficult. It has been said, "That sex is an itch that you cannot scratch!" EDOPHOLETEUSPEDRINI

[Olive]

Curiousmama, on Fri Mar 25, 2011 01:55 PM, said:

Hi all.

I am away from my bf for 3months ive stopped having sex. no sex for 3months, does make me less sexual?


I am very sexual person. (Im not gonna lie, I love being horny ) but now watching porn doesnt do anything to me. is it something wrong with me?

For some reason I thought this was another guy's thread... I stand corrected, but then I see that all the responses come from men and treated like a reflection of what men feel.

First of all, I have no idea what kind of porn you use to get off, but most of what I see around is geared to men not to women, so in general, that's the reason why I don't find it appealing. Now, what porn has to do with being sexual or not beats me. When you have a high sex drive, even an air breeze lifting the hair on your forearms is arousing.

I gather you're trying to replicate what men do with porn, and if I may, I would suggest that you start focusing on your own body and the nuances of sensations you have not just on your genitals but on every squared inch of your skin.