Prolly just the sting, but......
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:21 PM
Just got out of one of those good ol' LTRs turned south when I got hit with "you were too much like my brother or best friend" and that's why she couldn't go out with me.
I was raised under the concept of being that "nice guy" your mom always told you about that would come along n yada yada yada. But I'm a pretty cut n dry kinda guy - I prefer things being obvious, but after studying psychology for 2 years I can kinda get what is being said to me, although it bothers me when I feel I have to. Still tho, I feel like that going out w/ her for a year n a half I should've seen red flags that told me that's how she felt, but my brains drawing a blank
Any input, especially from the ladies?
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:26 PM
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:30 PM
I'd say it's a problem with the women, not the men when they knock you back.
However, the stereotype of the 'bad boy' thrives partly because of the danger, excitement, spontaenity etc. Perhaps upping the naughty factor...teasing...etc might be a way to start?
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:47 PM
Agree with Mina - the "nice guy" crap is just that - crap! I think it takes a long time to get to really know someone, and even then you never really know them because you aren't them!
Does that make any sense at all? HAHA!
Just be straight, don't play games (which I assume by this you don't), and be honest about what you want with this person. I'm not a read-between-the-lines person either, but my experience has always shown me that actions speak louder than words.
If you wanna stay out of the friend-zone, then tell them.
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:52 PM
xx much luck to you.
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 11:03 PM
My grandmamma used to always tell me "this too shall pass"
It's prolly just the sting from it being said today that's got my proverbial panties in a wad.
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 11:07 PM
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 11:35 PM
Posted Wed Jun 29, 2011 11:48 PM
Nah, we had pretty good sex up until the day we initially broke up. been 2 weeks now that we've been seperated
Posted Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:11 AM
yep, n we were going out for a little shy of 2 years
Posted Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:12 AM
Posted Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:18 AM
I know. But the fact that she's feeding me this hogwash sent me into an ALL CAPS RAGE!!! RAWWR!!!!!
I mean, there were girls I attempted to go out with prior who said similar things (although the more I think about it, me being like her brother n us having sex 9+ times a week makes me wonder if she's from Kentucky o.O) so when she said it this after I kinda started kickin my own ass thinkin that it was something I could've stopped. (I know - irrational thinking. I get it.)
This post has been edited by Beastachu: Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:19 AM
Posted Thu Jun 30, 2011 01:53 AM
Posted Thu Jun 30, 2011 07:19 AM
Posted Thu Jun 30, 2011 09:00 AM
Posted Sat Jul 02, 2011 11:41 AM
Posted Sat Jul 02, 2011 12:07 PM
It may seem discouraging atm, but you can find them if you dig a bit.
There was a female comedian that was ranting about how she turned down guys that were too nice in her youth and how she regretted it now.
"Too nice!!!" she exclaimed.
She also instructed women that men normalize and how much better nice guys were in the end.
Your ex may need to learn some life lessons, but like the tortoise and the hare fable, many times, irony shows that the slow and steady wins the race.
I'd say be yourself, especially if that is about being a good guy and take your early loses and enjoy the long term wins with a really great girl that appreciates you in the long run.
Posted Mon Jul 04, 2011 08:44 PM
Hi, I agree with the above comment, sounds like she has had enough and wants or has found someone else.
Talk to her and ask her outright what is going on, two years is a long time. Does she want more commitment or
has she just got tired of you.These are the sort of questions you should be asking her. Ask her what she wants from you,
what she expects,you must know where you stand in order to take action. It is not a matter of being a nice guy or the "brotherly"
type.Just be who you are, I have seen from people I have met that when they pretend to be what they are not relationships break up when they find out what you are really like, I am not saying you do this consciously but it does happen. Speak to her honestly about the way you feel towards her. She has the choice then to either accept or reject what you are offering.At least this way you will find out the truth...good luck and keep your chin up, as the saying goes "there are plenty more fish in the sea".....