bartender i really did it this time...broke my rule to have a good time src='
i did this once before soon afta i broke outta my long term. a boy from work who i flirted with offered me a ride home and i accepted stead of sittin round for the one i wuz waitin on. he wanted to grab a bite but i declined sayin i wuz drained so we just chatted in his car while he drove. i wuz a bit distraught. the last thing i wanted to do wuz discuss my problems, specially with someone who probly ratha i not get back togetha with my ex...again.
shut up and drive src='
im not sure where i got my voice, but at one point i quietly blurted out ya can stick ya hand down my pants if ya want. im certain i took him by surprise...he didnt react rite away and laughed are ya serious? i stone cold replied actually i am. i knew he would, betcha he woulda if i wuz still datin but ive nevah cheated. now i wuz free to do what i wanted with who i wanted...and i wanted to be fingered...and i didnt wanna talk bout me.
i wont paint some awesome picture that it wuz supah great for him or i rocked his world...i didnt give him a bj or handjob or fuck him (that nite). i rubbed ovah his jeans, felt his bulge but didnt touch his dick min to skin. i feel bad, at the time i wuz distracted with my own body as he kept cooin let me make ya feel good in my ear and its all i could focus on. id love to say i wuznt selfish but apparently i wuz.
he parked, we both unbuckled and i reclined my seat a lil. he leaned ovah with his rite hand on the backrest and his left hand slid inside my undone pants and into my panties. he shoved down and swept undahneath me, insertin 2 or 3 fingahs at once. i could feel my clit rub against his wrist when he pulled in and out. he fingerfucked me while i closed my eyes and felt his heavy breath on my neck.
he wuz pretty forceful and i came fairly quick. he wiped his hand on his shirt and that wuz it. i shoulda reciprocated. few weeks lata we were at a co-workers party afta hours, both wasted and i fucked him on top of a washin machine in the basement laundry room of their apartment buildin. twas the extent of our sexcapades. he wanted more if i wuz offerin but i wuznt ready for anythin serious. i havent seen him in a while, he has a job somewhere else.
waiter! bring me wata...i gotta make me keep my cool src='
this 'new' work hottie can get me stupid bothered. i literally WAITED 3 months, plus 1 fail to nail before havin his mouth on my puss. our schedules criss cross, hes busy when im not and vice versa. we rarely do anythin just the two of us unless its sexual and the frequency varies. that makes sense since were callin us 'casual', just messin round. were not datin, were not friends with benefits (or fuck buddies), were not anythin clear labelled i suppose...simply a fling to cling i cant quit. my weakness is flirtin with him at work, mostly on break to ache. im easily aroused if i let myself be...its the heat im attracted to but i dont wanna get burnt.
ya cant always get whatcha want...but ya get what ya need src='
i wanna say its the bees knees or the flies thighs...and satisfies my every desire but thats not true. im turned on, i admit theres couple moves he does that can run me wild...like when he had me kneelin on his bed with my hands against the wall while he took me from behind. if he hadnt braced me by the waist supportin my weight, i woulda passed out i wuz so fucken xcited to try a different position i hadnt been in before.
but somethin is lackin. were not quite on the same sticky page. i want new sexperiences, kinky and not so much but i dont wanna be bound or restricted cuz my partna is hesistant or weirded out by his own cum (for xample).
ive been there, ive done that and im sure as fuck not wantin to go backwards. for now its what it is. were both fulfillin sexual urges and keepin emotions in check. i wish he wuz everythin i wanted him to be. thats a tall ordah cuz im not all im cracked up to be for him othawise i think wed be more than body bumpas. he probly fears i will fall madly in love. usually im the one paranoid of leadin anyone on who mite show interest...knowin its fairly easy to get attached to my snappy happy self. my friends deem me luveable in a 'ya just wanna spank the punkass cuteness outta her' way. i cant shake that title. i wont deny im friendly...i tend to be.
[a kid i babysat once told me when he wuz old anuff he would marry me. i asked him why...curious if my short tator totness would be the answah...he told me i wuz the coolest person he knew...its the sweetest, most innocent thing any boy said to me...even if he didnt know that many people! he has since blown me off]
i swear i think i scare work hottie..not intimidate but actually scare..cuz hes commented ya a sexy lil beast aint ya. i wanna giggle, ya dont even know the half of it! i must exude an aura of i wanna ravage and tear him apart when im in the mood. maybe hes vulnerable with my spurts of aggressiveness aka xtreme horniness. maybe hes flashin back to that first nite in the tent...when in a fit of uncontrolled sex rage i told him i wuz gonna fuck him up...i didnt mean it literally! i say the wackiest stuff when im bout to cum, no filter whatsoevah. src='
girl just wants to have fun..thats all she really wants src='
one small peeve is that were not exclusive yet he gets annoyed by male attention i receive. hes gotta deal cuz imma waitress in a bar with lotsa human hormones drinkin booze. on the flip i cant sit round worryin whos lickin their lips thinkin hes eye-candy...i tend to ignore whos followin him for my own peace of mind. id ratha not know, or show i care...most days i really dont. thats not to cheapen what we have goin on.
my girls joke hes a playah cuz he wont commit...but im playin that same 'dont tame me' game. it bugs me to hear that...as if sayin its not ok to make this no rules, no xpectations and fun. the guys i hang with who know we random-repeat hook up are in awe that hes gettin laid with no obligations. thats also not true. he needs to treat me well, be respectful and be honest, the same i would xpect from a boyfriend or any friend. he has nevah spoken an ill-word to me or layed a fingah on me that shouldnt have been there.
i gotta say i havent been with any real jerks who were mean to me...i wonda if my luck will run out. for their sake i hope not cuz i have 3 oldah bros who would make em regret causin me pain...make em hurt...or make em 'disappear'.
more and more and more...i dont know where were goin to src='
i kinda know im holdin back cuz im drunk on the nakey naughtiness and im not always puttin me out there full exposed for a guy who will appreciate my dirty mind and horny lil body on a regular basis. im put off by relationships cuz i dont trust me to recognize if its time to get out...nice guys seem to trump the quality of sex ive had...and i know i can have both.
im drawn to many qualities that i need to narrow down which are most significant (and realistic). sex openness is definitely one...specially as i realize im more curious than i thought. a friend told me that sex should be limitless...he is sooo fucken rite that smart tart.
i just want a real to feel, sweet to eat, boy i enjoy who will stimulate me and me him...who wants to xplore and discover as badly as i do...who wants to cum along for the ride, park on the edge of the stiff cliff and make out. i want us to study our bodies from head to toe...EXAMine each otha so closely we can see the fingerprints we leave behind.
im ready willin to teach AND to learn...and keep him afta class for sextra credit.
the lyrics underlined (titles) are from songs i listened 2 while bloggin.
1. Rehab 2. Rihanna 3. Shania Twain 4. Rolling Stones 5. Cyndi Lauper 6. Captain Hollywood
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