There is a thread right now in the Member Content forum about female domination. I posted a summary of my thoughts on femdom there, but thought I’d give it a little more depth and put it here.
I enjoy vanilla sex, domination, and submission, depending on my mood. Most of the time I prefer vanilla sex, but sometimes I’m feeling dominant (and usually don’t mind taking that role if it’s what my partner wants), and occasionally I’m in the mood to be submissive. I don’t like the term “slave”, though. Submitting to being told what to do to please my woman makes me happy, but I don’t want to be treated like a slave. I want to feel like my partner respects me, but enjoys telling me how to give her exactly what she wants.
I do have some fairly extreme femdom fantasies, and I am a member of a few femdom-oriented forum sites (similar to this one, but with a tighter focus), and you might be surprised how many people are interested in this. Those sites tend to get very extreme, with people detailing their fantasies, and often portraying fictional stories as their real life experiences. Some stories are legitimate, of course, but many of them clearly are not. But whether the stories are true or not is often beside the point, in my opinion, because they are exciting to read either way. To me, though, the important thing about the extreme stuff is that while I might want to experience it briefly to live out a fantasy, I’d be worried about losing my partner’s respect over it. I don’t know if I could go through with some of it, no matter how hot it gets me, if I thought my partner would judge me for it. For that reason, I’m even reluctant to discuss some of my fantasies with women I date, because I don’t know how they’d react.
Some of the things I have actually done include being bound to a bed with an under-the-bed restraint set on a couple of occasions, being handcuffed to the bedframe, and being told what to do sexually (mostly things like "suck my nipple", "finger my clit", and so forth). I enjoy this a lot, though it's something I prefer to do occasionally to spice things up rather than on a regular basis.
I look at vanilla sex as creating an experience for my partner by choosing how to stimulate her, and being dominant is similar in that regard but with an additional set of tools (both literally and figuratively, I suppose) with which to stimulate. I’ve found that even in vanilla sex, my partner usually wants me to take the lead and be “in charge”. Submission is a nice break from that. Sometimes it feels good to be told exactly how she wants to be pleasured. Sometimes it's nice to be told "eat my pussy" and know that when you do it, it's exactly what she wants. With my last ex, our first experience with me being submissive took place on her side of the bed (whereas we normally had sex on my side), so from then on if I was in the mood for her to be in charge, I would signal it by lying down on her side of the bed. :D
Anyway, it’s an enjoyable aspect of sexuality, and something that I’d like to experience more of in the future, but definitely something I’d prefer to keep as an occasional variation rather than a lifestyle to live.