However the worst were more numerous. I often think about why they were so bad and I just don’t know. I welcome any ideas. Anyway I’d like to describe my 5 best and 5 worst lovers. Going to start with the bad because I think in order to understand why the 5 best were the best one would have to see what I had to deal with.
Names will not be used. No particular order
1. I met him at school. We had a class together and he asked me if I’d like to get something to eat sometime. I took him up on his offer and we went out to dinner. After he brought be back to his apartment. He made drinks and we sat on the couch watching television for a while. He started to put the moves on and when he leaned in to kiss I let him. It was the worst kiss I had ever had in my life. His tongue was being shoved down my throat and I had to push him away to keep from choking on it. It was messy and sloppy and just all wrong. He was my first after I had broken up with my boyfriend and at this point I was ready to experience new people. I let the kiss slide hoping that if we did have sex it would be so much better. He brought me back to his bed room where we rested on his bed. He slid his had under my skirt and began rubbing my pussy. It was able to get me wet enough. I pulled off my panties and hiked my skirt up. He undressed and placed the condom on as I moved to position myself on top. He groaned as I slid onto him. I moved slow as he grabbed my breasts then suddenly he came. I couldn’t believe it. I wasn’t even on 2 minutes and it was over. I was willing to compromise and take it up as it was just a first time thing. Surely the next time would be better. I got off and sat there waiting for him to do something. It felt too forward to ask outright for him to try to get me off. Nothing. After a while he got a text where his roommates had gone to a bar and asked if I wanted to go. I was frustrated at this point so I ended up going home. I could say that this was partially my fault but at the time I was not so bold as to ask what I wanted and tell what I wanted. He knew I hadn’t cum and for some reason I expected him to just make it better. He just didn’t seem to care. Later he asked me over again but I had to turn him down. It was something I just didn’t wish to experience again.
2. He was another student (like most of the guys I had slept with). This one I had met at a party. We’d send flirty texts back and forth but I wasn’t too interested in sleeping with him. I’d go weeks without talking to him and he’d suddenly send another text asking if I’d like to get together. Every time I had a steady partner. Then one time he caught me at just the right moment. I hadn’t had sex for weeks and I was craving something. I agreed to meet him that night. All day he sent me messages telling me everything he wanted to do with me. It admittedly turned me on. When I got to his place we immediately started to go at it. He went down on me for several minutes. But I cant cum from oral and while it felt good I wanted to fuck. I sat up and told him that I was ready to have sex and he starts getting ready pulling his clothes off. I ask for a condom and he stops. He tells me he doesn’t have any. Just my luck. I don’t really know what to say. All day long he had the time to go buy some and he didn’t. I don’t know if he though I was just going to let him go bareback (clearly as he didn’t ask if I had one), or if he thought because I was coming over I would supply them. I suppose I could have thought ahead and brought them myself. I expected him to suggest a store run and he did but only me. He asked if I would go buy some. I was tired and told him that it was probably best to try this another time (I had no intention of doing so). He continued to text me several times after but I ignored them he got the message and its been months. Perhaps I was too hard but I felt he was incredibly selfish and completely shortsighted. And to make it worse he got me sick. 2 days later I came down with a cold that completely made me lose my voice for several days.
3. Another boy from school. This one I had talked to before several months before we actually did anything. He was a nice guy very respectful. We’d agreed to become FBs but then suddenly he was gone. I didn’t bother to message him cause I’m not the type of person who is going to beg for sex. Several months later he sent me a message explaining what had happened. It was an understandable situation and he asked that we could try again. I agreed. When we got together I had realized how shy he was. Two shy people don’t work together when neither knows how to make the first move. It was awkward and uncomfortable. I like to feel confident and sexy but I was feeling more self-conscious than I’d ever had with a guy. I couldn’t tell if it was me and he wasn’t attracted to me or if he really was just shy and didn’t know where to start. I gave him an out and told him that I was ready whenever he was. He finally made his move and kissed me. It was a gentle kiss but there was no passion in it. #1 may have been a bad kisser but I could at least tell he was into it. I tried to bring more to it but there was nothing. Dead lips against mine. I had to stop. I’d felt him get hard and moved to go down on him. I pulled his pants off and worked my magic. I wasn’t too surprised when he came a few minutes later it happened all the time. I was a bit proud actually but probably prematurely. My own ignorance assumed if he came now then later it would last longer. He rubbed and fingered my pussy getting me so close. It wouldn’t take long for me to cum. When he had gotten hard again I was ready to feel him. He got ready as I positioned myself on my knees. He entered from behind. We were going for a solid 2 minutes when I heard him moan and I knew he had cum again. He pulled out and headed to the bathroom. I sat on the bed frustrated. I was so close and now I was losing my arousal. When he returned I asked if he thought he could possibly go again. He told me he could that he had to go to dinner at his parents. We’d wasted so much time trying to get to the sex. I didn’t protest and got dressed and walked him out. I had felt so undesirable it ruined the experience for me. I think about it and go back and forth about if it was him or if it was me and I just don’t know.
4. My first and only virgin. He told me he wasn’t. I’d spoken to him before and I knew that he had been. I told him that I didn’t have sex with virgins I didn’t want to be anybody’s first unless I was going to be their last and I knew that would not be the case. He swore he was no longer a virgin and I acquiesced. I knew he was lying to me. I had no proof but something deep in me didn’t believe him. Perhaps he really was not a virgin anymore but just extremely inexperienced. I can accept that but I cannot accept someone who is unwilling to listen and to learn. When we got together it was initially fine. He was a good kisser and he definitely got me hot. When we had sex it was just all wrong. When he was on top I had tried to guide him on the best way to do it for me. Perhaps he was influenced by watching too many porn movies as he just pounded away. I could hardly feel a thing but his weight on top of me. I told him to stop and I pulled my legs up for him hold as he fucked me. This lasted all of 2 minutes before he went back to pounding. I stopped him again and told him that it feels better and deeper when my legs are up. Again ignored. I pushed him off and tried another position hoping that he would be able to fare better. He went in from behind. A position where the straight pounding would work. Except it didn’t. There was no rhythm. His movements were erratic and all over the place. I told him to slow down, that he didn’t have to go so fast hoping that the slower movements would give a bit more consistency but he didn’t. I got frustrated and I wanted it to be over. I faked it as he came. I know I shouldn’t have but I really didn’t know what else to do. Perhaps I should have been honest about his lack of listening ability but I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. As someone who is just learning all about her sexuality and discovering new desires and pleasures of her body I don’t have the patience to be a teacher.
5. I met him at a party. He wasn’t a student but a friend of the hosts. We’d talked a bit and exchanged numbers. For a few days we’d texted back and forth. I wasn’t really sure about him but he seemed nice enough. I was in a dry spell and needed something good. I wanted something new and was hoping for the best. He came to my place and nearly immediately I knew this was going to be bad. We sat down in the living room and for several minutes it was silence because he was texting someone else on his phone. I sat there patiently waiting. When he stopped he apologized. I let it slide but then he started doing it again. I sat there wondering if I should just tell him to leave if he had something better to do. I was bored and annoyed. You ask for this and when I’m here, ready, you can’t put your phone down. It was completely impolite and ridiculous. After about 20 minutes of this BS he finally stopped. I was at this point not nearly as interested in continuing on with this. But he was here and I figured just get it over with. I should have known then that it was just going to be bad if I was, “wanting to get it over with”. It was such boring sex. I mean I think I nearly fell asleep at one point. I’m a very passionate lover but I cant work with someone who isn’t. Someone who is distracted by other things and isn’t really into it. He came twice and I came a big fat zero. He knew and tried to go down on me but I was just not into it anymore. I told him I was tired and since I had to work the next day that I should get to bed. I don’t know how he took it but he didn’t protest and I was glad. Just another situation I don’t understand. And another one that made me feel used. This was my last one and my breaking point. The one who made me come to the realization that I was being a slut. That I was fucking too many guys who didn’t deserve it. I was giving myself to people who didn’t care and I felt disgusting being treated that way. I deserve to be with someone who actually enjoys me and not someone who treats me like a faceless sex toy. Hell I’ve seen sex dolls being treated with more compassion. Not anymore
Part II: The Best coming soon