I am so fed up and frustrated with sex. I find it dirty and disgusting. I just wish that I didn't have to think about it or get the urge to have it anymore. I really long for companionship and to have someone to talk to and snuggle with. I find sex disgusting, because I am disgusted with myself. I hate sex because I hate myself. I don't deserve pleasure from sex, I deserve the lonely/bitter isolation I'm living in right now. It's no wonder I'm single. There's no way any woman would get near someone as damaged and filled with self-loathing as me.