di-choto-me: n., division into two parts or classes esp. when these are sharply distinguished or opposed.
Webster’s New World Dictionary
I am in my third day in Manhattan . . . the days are busy and for me the nights are slow. I occasionally will find an event or activity to do at night when I am here; which for the last 6 years has been twice a month for a week at a time. I did that earlier this week by visiting the Museum of Sex in Manhattan. It is a must see. But mostly when I am in the City it is like being at home (I was actually born there). So at night I spend quiet time in my hotel room or in the bar reading; and later in my bed having dry orgasms. Some of my best mmo sessions have been during Manhattan work trips. The feeling of resting in a comfortable bed, in a state of bodily fatigue, relaxing and giving into orgasmic waves as they repeatedly wash over me is indescribable.
MMO sessions in the City are a way for me to release after hectic days of presentations, meetings and getting around; especially in January. It is no fun to walk around in NYC late at night in January. The only place that is worse is Chicago. I have a rule that I do not go outside in Chicago after 7 pm in the winter. I just won’t do it.
So because this was Monday night NYC in January, there is very little incentive to go out, I settled in for a late evening - early morning shower, and a good two hour session afterwards. These sessions can vary in intensity depending on how horny I am and how much I can relax. Sometimes relaxing and letting them happen is very difficult when I am stressed. This is where meditation, relaxation breathing and other techniques help immensely, but sometimes even those don’t work. That is when I sleep to truly relax and get up at 4:30 to launch myself.
This last Monday night I was indeed good and horny; the session early Tuesday morning was a very satisfying one that yielded many deep orgasms with body stiffening contractions. The highs hit great crescendos and then released in waves of fluttering spasms over and over again. So after squeezing my prostate like a sponge on Tuesday night I gave my junk a rest. I can cum the day after a mmo session but I can’t do two dry orgasmic sessions in a row, one day after another. When I have done this (and I have because it is very tempting) it feels like I have blown a head gasket up my asshole. These things are so intense that two back to back sessions over two days leave me really - really sore.
A dry multiple orgasm is unlike a wet orgasm which yields cum, in that after a wet orgasm I am left feeling relaxed, lethargic and disinterested in sex (until I recover which could be 5 minutes or 45 minutes depending on how much incentive I am given). A dry mmo orgasm leaves me horny, and energized; it floods my bloodstream with hormones and other endocrine secretions. All of these hormones raging in me do a number of things to me; mainly they crank up my sex drive to amazing heights. I have said several times in the last two months of this blog that I have more sex drive now that I did 25 years ago. I want to fuck like crazy, and I want to (and am able to) for long periods of time. The joy for me now is greater in extended sex, than it is in “quick cum” sex. The sensation of fucking feels so good not only in my penis but throughout my entire pelvis; it feels so good that I don’t want to cum. My wife knows that when I return from a trip, she needs to plan for time on her back with me buried in her,. or time in the saddle cowgirl style, or legs in the air style …whatever suits her.
The other thing that the hormone flood in me does is it energizes my thought process. Some of my most cogent writing has happened after a night of me lying naked in a warm bed writhing in multiple – precum soaking orgasms.
So that is how it was yesterday. Monday night was a very hot session. The imagery I invoked was inspired by any number of things and from my own nasty imagination. The filthier the imagery is in my head the better the orgasm; I have had some absolutely nasty thoughts over the last two years, leading some ball shuddering orgasms.
So after my session on Monday night – early Tuesday morning, I was walking around all day Tuesday with my mind racing on sexy things and creative things as well. After a morning of walking and appointments I go to my favorite Thai restaurant in lower Manhattan for lunch. I sat looking around at the people in the restaurant. It is an intimate - small place which appeals to the younger crowd that works in the entry level and management trainee positions in finance, banking, and the stock market in the neighborhood. Many of the couples in the restaurant are mixed couples (guys and girls). Some are involved in romantic relationships with each other while others are just groups of coworkers that are mixed gender; there is a weird dynamic at those tables of mixed gender co workers. The mixed pairs talk about work, coworker issues, and they joke as peers, but underneath it there is sexual tension and the dichotomy of doing something intimate like sharing lunch in a romantic little place while you talk about serious work; but the desire is always lurking.
This sexual tension that is set up in the restaurant between work relationship and sexual attraction is really a fascinating dichotomy. I sit there watching the girls leaning into the guys with their heads tilted, listening and virtually offering themselves to them. I watch the guys bouncing their legs under the table and drumming their fingers like cats ready to pounce on their prey. But they talk about the mundania of work. I look at the intensity of the conversations and I am sure many of the guys are thinking….to hell with price earnings ratios and roi, I just want to rip your dress off and bury my face in your pussy.
These conversations and my own horny condition get me to thinking about my own desire. I sit there and think what is it in me that drives my desire? What turns me on ?
The answer for me is the dichotomy of human function and sexual desire, and the dynamic tension of the forbidden and the sublime.
I think about the beauty of natures most perfect and intriguing creation: the female breast. I have written about it in this blog many times. The breast is not only an amazingly beautiful object, but is a complex machine that produces the fluid that allows our species to continue on this earth. But they are also tits. They are these highly sexualized objects that cause my cock to harden instantly and turn incredibly sensitive.
I am a guy. Like most guys when my sex drive is driven up, it makes my cock get so hard that it hurts; when this happens my body has the need to unload my juice in a woman as hard and fast as possible. Yet, when I make passionate love to the woman I love, my brain pushes me to go slowly and gently and savor the moment and the sensations that her vagina imparts on my penis. At these times my focus becomes the delightful sensation on my penis as I gently and loving slide in and out of her steamy wet hole; but always in the background is the desire to consume her lustily in my heat.
I am a silversmith in my spare time. For many years I have carved silver (and gold when I can afford it) into rings, bracelets, hair ornaments, earrings and small ornate boxes. I enjoy the feeling of removing silver from stock, of grinding and shaping and forming hard silver stock into a beautiful object. I like the resistance that I get as I am grinding and the hardness of the silver. Yet when I am getting undressed in the same room as my wife and she is stripped down to her silk bra and panties I will often stop her dead in her tracks so that I can run my hands over the warmed silk that covers her breasts, ass and vulva, enjoying the silky feel of them and the sensual underlying warmth of her. There is nothing that feels like a warm breast under a silk bra, as its nipple hardens under my warm hand. Or the warm feel of her vulva covered by silk panties. I will often lull her to stand there while I run the same hands that experience joy in grinding metal all over her supple sensitive parts clad in silk. If I do this long enough and get her to relax to my caresses she will dampen her panties as my hands warm her vaginal lips.
Dichotomy is a particularly sexy characteristic in female genitalia. I have attested many times in this blog how much I love vaginas, cunts, or pussies whatever one wants to call the miraculous part of a woman that lies behind her vulva. Their flower like structure and their ability to produce life juxtaposed to their earthy character is what makes the vagina so mysterious and wonderful to me. Just the fact that they have so many names each with a different connotation . . . that in and of itself speaks directly to the dichotomy of the vagina.
The part of female anatomy that embraces the dichotomy more than any other part of the female anatomy for me is the anus. Its primary function is obvious the elimination of waste, yet to me (and many others) it is an intensely sexual part of the female body. While I have never indulged in anal sex with my wife, I am a dedicated analinguist. It took me hours of gentle cajoling the first time for her to allow me to probe her asshole with my tongue. Now she gladly spreads her ass cheeks to allow me to kiss, lick and probe her tender anus with my tongue. Even after all these years, the initial touch of my warm tongue on her anus will cause it to pucker and draw inward in delight. It is very sensitive and sexy.
So tomorrow afternoon I will go home, arriving at home at about 8 PM. I have not cum since New Years day as described in the previous entry. That morning we fucked gently, deeply and very emotionally in a very passionate interlude that led to me leaving her insides awash with a flood of my thick hot sperm. Since then I have been having self induced dry orgasms. Over the last ten years I have made a commitment to myself that I will not jerk off while I travel, regardless of how horny I am. The heat that builds up in me while I am gone is energy that I use and enjoy using when we join on my return.
The intensity of the feeling that I have and the desperation for her pussy that I feel when I fuck her after 5 days of being away from her is intense. My penis becomes a dowsing rod of hard wood that seeks her sweet wetness and coaxes (or forces) it to release her orgasm to me unleashing a stream of her cum. I sometimes think of that orgasm as a gift to me, but in reality it is clearly hers and no one else’s. It is her pussy that builds up to the apex of her desire and forces her body to experience the jerking waves of ecstasy that her orgasms bring. But in a very direct way it is a gift that she does share with me. There is no other bodily function or sensation that I can share with her in the way that she shares one of her orgasms with me. It is not the same for me because when she brings me to orgasm by hands, mouth or vagina she is on the outside. With her orgasms I am inside of her, if we are fucking or if my tongue or finger is inside her. Indirectly I am part of her as she is experiencing her orgasm. This is an amazing dichotomy that something that is hers and part of her body can be uniquely sensual and personal to her , but at the same time it can be with me as well.
So we will fuck tomorrow night but before we do I will no doubt relish all parts of her body as she urges me to hurry so I can penetrate her, but despite my desire to ravish her I will go slow. I will revel in the simultaneous dirtiness and sensuality of what we do; and that interplay will make me very hot, driving me to fuck her hard in a very tender way. I will fuck her with urgency and desperation but I will do patiently and loving at the same time.
With age has come appreciation but especially patience and the knowledge that if I am patient and I gently urge her to her pinnacle but don’t rush her into orgasm , her sensation of it when it finally does arrive it will be complete and deep and very intense. I am a patient lover and I can be a forceful lover as well. I can fuck her hard so that her tits jiggle as bump her vulva with my pubic bone or I can gently glide in and out her as if she was a voluptuously curved cello, and I was a fine – long and sturdy bow.
Dichotomy is a wonderful thing and its sexy as hell.
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