A few years back I had a close call- so to speak. I answered an ad for a young, hot, college kid. After conversing via emailing for some time he revealed that he was in his forties. Deception is a total deal breaker for me. I was furious. (I also, up to that point, had only been with younger guys and wasn’t interested in older. Later I tried them and found they had a lot to offer.) I told him I wasn’t happy that he lied and I was done. But he kept pursuing me. And he started to get frustrated and angry. He threatened to tell my husband!! I freaked out. Unfortunately at this point he had all the power. I don’t know why but I had let him see my Facebook page! What a fool I am! He knew my husband’s name and god knows what else. I tried threatening him back by saying I’d tell his wife but I knew virtually nothing about him and he probably knew that I didn’t have enough information to find her. Looking back I wonder how I got into that situation. It’s absolutely ludicrous and brainless. Fortunately for me he slowly backed off. Occasionally emailing as the months went on but he was less hostile; until finally he gave up.
Recently, however, I met “the crazy one”. He never threatened me, but the way he snapped makes me think he was genuinely insane in some way. I was browsing the odd-job section of Craigslist. Not necessarily looking for work, just curious if there was anything that might be interesting, fun, or really good money. Well, I struck gold. It was an ad for breastmilk. It was rather vague, as if it was for a baby; but I know there’s a market for men with breastmilk fetishes and I was comfortable with either option. (I was, in case it’s not clear, breastfeeding. Still am, in fact). Well, within a couple of emails he reveals that he wants to pay to breastfeed and I was like, “cool. $150 a session.” He was like, “That’s pretty high.” He said he had a lot of other responses that were asking for less. I was surprised but I believed him. As I write this –and the story above – I want to bash my head against the wall. Why am I so naïve and gullible??? Of course he didn’t have other responses! Thankfully I didn’t back down. It was a fair price.
We continued to email and even made a plan to meet. Right before the meeting he canceled on me however. I don’t know why. Was he nervous? I’ll never know.
He sent me a picture and he was ugly. But part of the job as an escort (which I may have well have been at this point) is to give “the girlfriend experience”. I’m not kidding. You can actually specify that when you order. So I rubbed his ego. Not lying – just saying kind things. He ate it up, but I think he started to think I really did like him and would (therefore) be with him free of charge. He started to crack around the time he found out I was still going to charge him. Up until that point he had been getting more and more affectionate. Was he falling in love? I don’t know. Within a very short period of time, however, he basically went from “I love you” to “I hate you.” It scared the bejesus out of me. I suddenly recognized that I was emailing “the crazy one”. The one that they say is out there but I never really believed them. And here’s the kicker… just like I had revealed too much in the story above, I had revealed too much to this one too!! He had been helping me with my resume. He knew everything! Address! Phone number! Job history! Contacts!
Now here’s the happy ending to the story. Realizing that I was in a very precarious situation I wisely decided to appease him. I told him I understood. That he was right. That I wasn’t mad at him for ending our “relationship”. I was able to let him break it off without upsetting him more. And I showered him with nicknames, really trying to show him that he had the upper hand and I was the one rejected.
Weeks later he emailed me and asked if I was still looking for work. I wanted nothing to do with him but I couldn’t risk upsetting him by letting him know that. So I wrote a long email about how everything he said earlier was right and I shouldn’t have been doing this and thank you so much for the good advice, you’ve made me a better person… It worked. Thank god. He wrote back and to save face he clarified that he wasn’t talking about for himself (yeah right) but instead that he wanted to refer me to some of his colleagues in the medical field for networking purposes. I thanked him profusely but declined his (fake) offer. I love how he posed the bait email to allow himself to save face if necessary.
Months after that he wrote me again! He casually asked how things are going and if I still needed money. This time I had the brilliant idea of telling him that my baby wasn’t breastfeeding much and my milk was drying up. But I added the friendly, “lucky for you, new babies are born every day!” I always tried to keep the emails really light-hearted. I think it worked. He wished me a Merry Christmas. I said, “You too, babe” and he thanked me.
And that’s how, I would like to believe, I dodged a bullet. ‘Course, if another Craigslist Killer strikes, you should cross-check my profile pic with the victim.
Ugh! This blog post ended so beautifully. And now I have to mess it up by telling you all that the saga has not ended. :( I just received an email (12/26/12) that said, "I was thinking that I'm interested in meeting up and perhaps try suckling...what say?" grrrrr. I answer, "Honey, I'm sorry, my milk has dried up. And I really took your advice to heart about not doing things like this. I'm sorry we will never get to meet."
He responded: "Sorry about asking at the first place. I am glad you took my advice to heart and I'm sorry as well that we will never get to meet. Beyond this, I'd not be bothering you anymore by writing. Wish you all the best!"
THEN he emails
"Also, one more question, IF you've taken my advice, why do you come to this 'secret' email? Care to share?"
Shit! So i tell him my message board friends email me there.
He said, "On your "hidden" account? to be honest, I'll be sad that some person that connected so well with me has decided to "part ways"...but your decision is fine, I'm not going to contest that."
I finally had to get firm and say it. "please stop emailing me."
He responded: "Ok, I'm not going to be emailing anymore. Good bye" and "And thanks for the rudeness!"
He clearly doesn't know the difference between directness and rudeness. Just like he doesn't know the difference between making friends with a pretty girl online and scaring the shit out of a pretty girl online.