With all of that being said, here's a few pointers I've learned over the years (Lord saying years is getting freaky at this point!)
1. Communicate, communicate, communicate You must remember that unlike a real life relationship, you can't see what is going on. Body language and actions mean alot, but online, you have to put everything you're feeling, experiencing and thinking into type written words (or voice). It takes work, but if you're both open and totally honest, it builds a firm relationship.
2. Trust If you feel you can't trust the person you're dating online, then you've got a big problem. You must learn to trust him/her and build a relationship off of this because you can't be there in their everyday lives and know exactly what's going on. If you can't trust them and are all the time trying to control them and check on them to see who they're with or what they're doing, it tears the relationship apart. Believe me, if Chef ever tried that one on me, we would have MAJOR issues! But, we trust each other and never doubt each other's commitments to each other. We've been that way for a very long time.
3. Realization As hard as it is, you must realize that in an online relationship, you have to live your real lives seperately. This means there maybe times of seperation (unfortunately) b/c you can't always take him/her with you. Plus, there are times when the Internet just isn't a part of most people's lives. Granted, there are some people like myself who do live online, but in my case, Chef does not live online. That means we have to suffer at times b/c when life gets hectic time online is the last thing that's going to happen. I'm not saying cut off communication at all, but you have to realize, you can't physically take them with you shopping, or to hang out with friends. Although we have tried IMing via cells and texting to do all of these things before, but it's not the same as both of us sitting down in front of our coputers to spend quality time together. But, you learn to deal and take what you can get IF you truly love the person. Believe me, it's difficult at times, but I would NEVER give up my Chef for anything including lack of time together. He's my world forever and always.
Those are the top three things I've come to realize over the past few years. Believe me, I'd love to be able to just step straight through the cell or the laptop and curl up on his lap and never budge again, but unfortunately, I can't do that. So, I have to learn ways to cope with the pain and know that soon there will be a real us that will forever be there just as our souls have always been together.
Hmm isn't it amazing how when you look at it an online relationship is so much like a real life relationship? All you're mimssing is the physical touch in reality!!! I know I know this is something hard for most people to sacrifice, but remember, once the bodies touch....ooooo lala at the sparks that will start flying and all of the making up for lost time to take place. baby for a few weeks straight, I hope.
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