[Saysoon]

Only been to a group twice and after that didn't go back, as it did nothing for me, but neither did one to one counselling. I would be a listener, might as one or two questions to clarify things in my mind but listen to what my friends who be telling me. Then if I can help or even just give a hug will do so.

The things I have needed to talk to about even with counsellors have ranted and raved got it out and then wanted it over with, don't like rehashing the same thing over and over again. Yes I have a Pandora box which will remain closed no matter what. Nowadays if needed will call a friend give advance warning that need to rant and rave will do for about 5 minutes and then go ok what happening with you. Or else go to the beach and throw stones in the water.

[IMAGINATIVE]

I if I was the new guy in a session group I would spend more time listening, as I become more comfortable with being there I would open up and speak more. Personally not a big fan of group sessions, but each to his own.

[SF's Sweetheart]

initially, the first couple of meetings i would just listen, totally digest what is said, and over the weeks see how things develop.

Then if i feel it is right, then i will join in.

lets take an example, one of the ladies says, my partner makes me shave, a reply from a guy might be, well why not?

i would say hold on, i love to shave, but nobody makes me, its my body, i will do what i want, if my hubby wants me to grow back and says so, i will think about it, but i will only think, yes i might grow back, but he can not make me.

so you have your own views, its how and if you express them

[n2kinky]

IT would fully depend on the subject. If it was something I didn't have first hand knowledge about and I could learn something, I would keep my mouth shut and listen, maybe asking a few questions. If I had knowledge someone else could benefit from, I would speak and share the information I had.

[got2bgood]

The whole idea behind group therapy is just that...to get a group of people communicating back and forth, sharing ideas, working through issues etc etc. The more actively involved everyone is the better the outcome, so my vote goes to real good skills in both the talking and listening departments. Just one viewpoint can change a big issue in a hurry. Goes without saying, not being a good listener, can me you miss on the good words that are really going to be of value.

Notice I did refer to them both as skills, because a good talker stays on topic and doesn't veer away...that is a skill. Listening is also a skill to be able to listen intently and absorb all that is being said...not just hearing what you want to and the heck with the rest.

[D M]

for me i would listen untill i feel i would need to speak by listing i can learn more then talking

[Ryleigh]

for me it would be listening........i am usually very quiet and dont like crowds at all, however helping others even if it is just by listening or lending a shoulder often helps one heal as well.

[timewilltell]

I would just listen. At least for a while. I have to have some sort of comfort level before I could get into a verbal, intimate discussion. Speaking in front of groups makes me nervous, so it could take a while. I would add opinions, comments, concerns to others' discussions, but mine would stay with me until I felt ready.

[sexycharlene]

Haven't been in this situation, but if someone was having problems in a group setting, I'd want to listen and offer advice to try and help. Usually don't like disclosing my issues cause I don't want ta burden others with more specially if they have a lot in their plate as it is.

[katzar vekolea]

mostly i am just listening but if i have the option to talk and to share my problems i prefer to share with other people that maybe can help me

[Jessibelle]

While I've never been to group based therapy for anything in my 1 on 1 session for issues I do rabbit on a lot and tend to run out of time as I have so much to talk about, so based on this I would assume I'd be a chatterbox in a group session as well. Good job there are so many people classing themselves as listeners =P

[Madre90&G]

I listen alot and only talk when needed

[exNav67]

Usually I'll just listen to others. I'll probably only talk about myself if I see it adding value to the discussion. But I think it's good to listen. That helps to create good communication.

[Q]

I'm not a group type , too many things moving , too much noise , too many ppl to track at once .
Yeah , I have issues ................

[SexyFantasyGirl]

In group counseling sessions I would think that they have group discussions about the problems that people are having there,

so I believe you could learn a lot from both from being a listener than speaker.

I think it would be good for you to talk to different people about your problem and hear what they had to say about it, just as much as being a listener to other peoples problems.

This post has been edited by sexyfantasygirl: Wed Mar 13, 2013 07:46 AM

[Dougsan]

Group therapy I have experienced is not "group support." AA is group support. I find AA meeting necessary for many of us but they help people keep sober not work on why they are drunks or dopers.

Only in my experience, group therapy should last about 6 months, be limited to X people and, when people quit (and they do) they shouldn't be replaced (bringing a newbie up to speed sets the rest back). All members should be dealing with the same set of problems and all members must agree to work in the meetings. No listeners. All speakers. The group dynamic should keep all members honest. I've done three groups like this (6 months, 3 months and 6 months) and they were dynamite. The problems they helped me put on the back burner constitute a long list.



Again, an opinion based on what has worked for me.

[Dougsan]

iaav, you hit an important part of group therapy, for me. You learn right off the bat you aren't alone and you aren't the most fucked up guy in the universe.

[FireflyBiGirl]

I'm a natural listener. Talking is very hard for me, so I tend not to do it as much. I've forced myself to try more often, though. I had a relationship fail because I couldn't communicate with her. I don't want that to happen again. The only way to get more comfortable with talking is to do it.

[Dougsan]

SF's Sweetheart, on Fri Mar 30, 2012 09:29 AM, said:

initially, the first couple of meetings i would just listen, totally digest what is said, and over the weeks see how things develop.

Then if i feel it is right, then i will join in.

lets take an example, one of the ladies says, my partner makes me shave, a reply from a guy might be, well why not?

i would say hold on, i love to shave, but nobody makes me, its my body, i will do what i want, if my hubby wants me to grow back and says so, i will think about it, but i will only think, yes i might grow back, but he can not make me.

so you have your own views, its how and if you express them

That should never happen in group therapy. In your scenario, you were attacked. Unless you're faking or avoiding you should never be attacked. The guy, if he says anything, should ask how does it make you feel to be bossed? Or, Were you bossed or just asked? He, and the others in the group, if they are listening, are suppose to help each other understand what is causing them distress. Properly conducted group therapy, IMO, is almost better than having a true friend who understands me and can see through my problems when we discuss them.