Why can't I cum?!
Posted Fri Oct 21, 2011 07:23 PM
Posted Fri Oct 21, 2011 07:36 PM
Posted Fri Oct 21, 2011 07:43 PM
how can he expect you to please him freely if he wont offer the same?
Posted Fri Oct 21, 2011 07:45 PM
Posted Fri Oct 21, 2011 08:19 PM
Posted Fri Oct 21, 2011 08:41 PM
That's a shame that you feel he is repulsed. But maybe that feeling isn't unfounded. I do know some guys (just like some women) don't enjoy giving oral (some don't even like receiving it ... egad!). Sometimes its a cleanliness thing, or lack of exposure, fear of failure or rejection. Whatever the case may be. If you have talked to him and he's tried to alleviate your fears then perhaps they are unfounded. Maybe ask what he likes and dislikes about it. Some women have a stronger scent/taste than other women. If he doesn't enjoy it as much because of that or the wetness factor then perhaps trying some dental dam as a barrier. Especially maybe a flavored or scented one so that he can be enticed to just go for it. Also maybe trying it while in the shower can maybe alleviate hidden fears/worries on both sides (yours and his) if its the idea of cleanliness or freshness that is causing a distraction. I would also definitely recommend adding as much positive feedback as you can while he is down there and if he's not used to doing it for a while (which believe me takes practice, just like women get "lock-jaw" it can be uncomfortable for men too sometimes!) then maybe talk him into playing lightly a little, taking a break (or coming up for air so to speak) to kiss your thighs, stomach, breasts or other body parts then moving back down and getting more into it, and just taking breaks here and there until he can get "up to speed". If he's open to suggestions then perhaps mentioning how you like it specifically. "Lighter on top" "use the flat part of your tongue and slide it from the bottom to the top" "insert the tip of your tongue and then rub up" "circular motions" "Just on the sides" I dunno. LOL... However you like it. Pay attention when you use your vibrator. Where do you concentrate it as you build up to orgasm and where do you hold it or how do you move it as you climax? Maybe try to position him in similar ways. Also if it is a sensation thing and he's game I would also suggest to get over the first hurdle (of coming while he's going down on you) is to have him go down on you while using the vibrator on you at the same time. This may boost your experience and incorporate his play and boost his confidence from seeing you cum from that perspective. And of course let him know how much you appreciate all his efforts, even the ones that fall short. Good luck! One last tip... lol ... just the tip.... lol Maybe have him trying g-spot stimulation or even just penetrative stimulation with his fingers or a toy while he's down there. Some women I've found can cum with a vibrator but oral sex just doesn't do it alone. However with a little penetration and/or g-spot stimulation and oral/clitoral they can come even better than from a vibrator or sex! Again... good luck!
Posted Tue Oct 25, 2011 09:40 PM
Posted Wed Oct 26, 2011 11:49 PM
Also, if he fingersnyou while doing it...you'll come quicker.... Just a thought! Good luck!!! Also, try not to worry about it...ICH. It could happen"