Of the Guys You Know, Why Do They Get Great Girls? What really seems to work?
Posted Fri Dec 07, 2012 10:28 PM
Hi, just wanted to start a dating thread about what a lot of people are probably wondering. There are all these great women out there, but we only meet so many guys that really seem to have no problem getting great women. And I don't mean players who are good at getting the dumb or weak-willed ones--there are some guys who are just what women want. So what do they do, and what do they have, that other guys don't? Obviously confidence is the 1st thing, so let's leave that out of the picture since we all know it. And please no horrible answers like "It all depends, there's no one answer." Everything depends on everything, we get it, please don't waste our time when we're trying to figure things out.
The guy I know is tall, handsome, skinny, and an artist--but his work is very risky/unstable, and he wasn't schooled well, and I think that might be why his relationships usually don't last more than a month.
Another guy in highschool was a handsome football quarterback who ended up being an engineer (smart), but he was 5'8" and didn't ever really get anyone above his height.
What do those guys you know have--what actually works? Let's end this question once and for all.
Posted Fri Dec 07, 2012 11:08 PM
the people i've found tend to have the longest lasting relationships are the couples where both sides are both putting in effort to keep it going. people often get too complacent after the "honeymoon period" and that's where things fall apart.
i don't think it has anything to do with job security and schooling until you get into the further stages of the relationship where you begin to share responsibilities around money so i don't really think that would be what is causing that artist guy's relationships to fall apart. it's all about who you end up with and how you choose to treat them, as well as how they choose to treat you.
Posted Fri Dec 07, 2012 11:49 PM
Posted Sat Dec 08, 2012 04:05 AM
Sorry but ain't gonna happen. What you are asking for doesn't exist. At least not as in solution that works for everyone, each time, and in every situation. How many times have you seen couples that *shouldn't* be together? Like a guy who doesn't look all that great or drives a Ferrari but dates a gorgeous woman? Or an athletic, handsome guy who does drive a Ferrari but dates an 'ordinary' looking girl? So it's not all about the looks, perceived beauty, money, etc ... There are many different, and sometimes contradicting, concepts on what works and what doesn't. What works in one scenario might be totally counterproductive in another.
Instead of going into endless debate about all those different concepts I'll tell you what I do, and most importantly, works for me. I am genuinely interested in and love women. I know what I like and what I don't like and will not compromise and settle for less. I know I have a lot to offer to a woman I take interest in but what she has to offer to keep me interested in her? I don't play games, she will have no doubts about if I like her or not. Very soon she will learn that just her good looks is not the only thing I am interested in and won't get her very far. Those who play 'hard to get' and other silly games I leave others to have 'fun' with. Last but not least, I always assume she likes me. If it turns out she doesn't no big deal, no drama, no loss ... I just move on, there is no shortage of those who will like me.
Posted Tue Dec 11, 2012 03:44 AM
Posted Tue Dec 11, 2012 08:47 AM
Ever since I was very young, I have been told repeatedly by many that I'm a 'great' girl, whatever that means... I figure this meant (I'm too old to consider myself 'girl' material anymore) that I'm reasonably attractive, that I'm a competent cook and that I'm also relatively cultured and well educated. The problem is that my package brings other things as well... That I don't need anyone to support me financially (so the crap of exchanging monetary benefits for sexual favours doesn't work on me), that I don't rely on others to solve my problems, that I don't appreciate being told what to do 'just because' (sorry, I need reasons)... Oh and please don't make me forget the part where I have something to say about pretty much any topic (so don't expect me to provide silence if I disagree).
In my personal opinion, this notion of the 'great' girl is some social construct that probably had more sense back in the 50s.
Now, finding a 'great' guy... That's an entirely different predicament.