Paranoid and insecure Looking for relationship advice
Posted Thu Feb 20, 2014 12:31 PM
Posted Thu Feb 20, 2014 03:33 PM
Posted Thu Feb 20, 2014 03:43 PM
Posted Thu Feb 20, 2014 07:16 PM
Another old saying comes to mind "Look before you leap" .
Posted Thu Feb 20, 2014 08:23 PM
I never used to be the jealous sort at all..I look back and I am like wtf where was my head. So now I have gone in completely the opposite direction, keep in mind he has NEVER done anything to ever even make me think he is cheating. It sucks I hate being this way and yes I have said things to him and holy wow it sets him off. He gets very upset with me as he rightly should. he keeps repeating "am I your ex" "have I done anything to make you think I wouldn't be faithful"
Its a bad bad road to take. He knew from the very beginning what my stance was and how I had become..your girlfriend however does not..you DO have to be open with her and let her know your insecurities but it wouldn't be wise to ask if she is cheating..
Your going to have to sit down with her and have a serious talk about how your feeling because she has prolly already figured out something is wrong just not what and it may be causing her to act different as well.
Posted Fri Feb 21, 2014 04:49 AM
But like everyone is saying here - DO NOT confront her with suspicions but rather talk about your own feelings and also ask bout hers. Better communicate openly about how your feeling and ask her why you would be feeling this. This helped us and we quickly could fix whatever the problem was.
Posted Sat Feb 22, 2014 08:31 AM
I think most people have insecurities in one fashion or another, this is normal, what you do with it however is what makes the difference.
My question to you, what drives this insecurity ? What makes you feel this way ? Once you face your issues then and only then can you break down that insecurity barrier and move forward.
For years I myself was insecure. I had penis envy and performance issues. Was always doubting my size and performance and it was making my mind wander to places it should never have gone. Always questioning myself and her or her actions. Once I faced my insecurities and accepted my issues as being my issues, then and only then could I change myself. I learned that size does not matter ( much ) and that there is more than one way to skin a cat, so I let go of my size issue and focused more on pleasing her beyond our wildest imaginations. There were several things I had done/still do do to subdue my size issues. I use/used a penis pump, use cock rings, cock sleeves and purchased several dildo's of various sizes which helped me conquer my penis envy. I also learned how to control my pc muscles to prolong my erection and prevent premature ejaculation. I also changed my mindset and focused all my attention on giving my wife pleasure beyond any sexual encounter she may ever had in the past. I scoured the internet reading articles about sex and viewed numerous pages and diagrams of the female anatomy. I was and still am on a mission of giving my wife the best sex ever each and every time we have sex. All of this has worked for me and my insecurities. Sure, someday I still have a wandering mind but I keep those thoughts in check and remind myself that I have done and still do everything in my power to be the best fuck she has ever had and that puts my mind at ease and I stop thinking about it.
If my wife was to cheat on me, it will not be due to sexual pleasure, for that demon has been slain and conquered. There are however some other aspects beyond the bedroom that need work and I continue to strive at bettering myself to allow her to love me and stay in love with me. There is more to a relationship than just sex, its the whole package. So give her all you can, both in and out of the bedroom. If you have given it your all, then there is no reason for her to stray and if she does, it will not be due to you, it will be completely on her and then you can/will decide to move on from there knowing you did everything in your power to please her.
Always remember, if someone is going to cheat, there is nothing you can do to stop them so do not dwell on the things you cannot change and focus on the things you can change.
Posted Sun Mar 02, 2014 10:57 AM
I think a good place to start is an open, honest conversation about each of your insecurities and whether or not you are both happy.