How to help bf with premature ejaculation?
Posted Tue Jul 19, 2016 11:36 AM
Posted Tue Jul 19, 2016 04:39 PM
Posted Wed Jul 20, 2016 02:38 AM
I feel sorry for you both, I've been lucky and not have this problem though every now and again I can cum sooner than I have wanted to.
The best thing you can do is being understanding of his condition which you seem to be doing. Kudos to you. My advice is that you both seek a sex therapist together as it will take both of you to resolve this issue. I have read a bit about PE before on the 'net and from what I can remember it is something that isn't fixed overnight, it will take time. If counseling is not an option then read up about it on the 'net or as you said seek advice from your doctor. Don't despair as PE can be resolved. My other advice is to stop using the spray, without looking into it but I'm guessing that it is a gimmick.
P.S It is great to see another aussie in here, shame about the circumstances for the reason that ya joined up.
Posted Wed Jul 20, 2016 03:00 AM
Posted Wed Jul 20, 2016 04:24 AM
The squeeze technique is often recommended as a therapy for premature ejaculation. Just before ejaculation, the shaft of the penis is firmly squeezed between the thumb and forefinger. The squeezing causes a significant reduction in the erection which prevents ejaculation.
Many men claim that the squeeze technique has helped reduce their premature ejaculation. However, most agree that squeeze technique must be practiced in order to learn the proper timing and squeeze location and pressure. Some men have their partners participate, actually administering the squeeze technique. Several uncontrolled studies have described great success with the squeeze technique but upon review of the literature, it appears that no formal clinical studies have been performed.
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Posted Thu Jul 21, 2016 10:18 AM
Seriously, if, while making love to you, he focuses his mental imagery on something completely non-sexual - like baseball (not really an Aussie thing, granted) - it can really help. Sex is as mental as it is physical, and shifting the mind's focus to a totally different subject does work.
My boyfriend certainly doesn't suffer from any PE issues, but when he's inside me and pounding away, he will often put his mind in another place, simply because he wants the act to go on for 20 or 30 minutes or longer. He's greedy that way! (But seriously, I adore it, too!)
Given the PE situation, how long does he last? Is it mere seconds? Or 2-3 minutes?
Another thing to try, especially if you're relatively new as an intimate couple (and if the PE issue isn't a matter of seconds, but minutes) is to let him have his first orgasm, but don't let the sex end there. Keep him going, be supportive and encouraging, and after a refractory period (which in a young man should be very short), mount up for a second go! He will usually last much longer before a second orgasm, and over time, he will get more accustomed to you as a lover, and that will make the first session last longer, as well. I typically won't even go for my own orgasm until my boyfriend is in me for his second. Even after he's had two (and I've had one), he'll mount me for a third - I'm done at that point, but I adore having him inside me, and I love giving my man the pleasure he needs!
Then there was that memorable evening when I climbed on top and rode him cowgirl to his fourth orgasm... And we're a couple of men in our 50's!!
I do wish you and him well! Sometimes, these things take time to work out. Time, experience, becoming used to each other as lovers, and staying supportive and loving, and (I know it's hard) not appearing impatient, frustrated, judgmental. In spite of braggadocio, machismo, and all that, the male sexual psyche and ego can be a fragile thing. My boyfriend is the king and master of our bed, and I make sure he knows that - and more importantly that he knows that *I* know that - every moment we are in bed! Or wherever else we might find ourselves having sex - on the stairs, bent over the kitchen counter, in the back seat of my truck, in the tent while on a camping trip...