need some opinions.
Posted Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:20 PM
Posted Tue Apr 07, 2009 11:16 PM
Posted Tue Apr 07, 2009 11:48 PM
Posted Wed Apr 08, 2009 01:22 AM
Posted Wed Apr 08, 2009 01:41 AM
Posted Wed Apr 08, 2009 07:05 AM
You're going to have to be patient for a while. Try not to put pressure on her, that will only make matters worse in general. Try to encourage her in an affectionate way, but only by steps...
And yeah, watch out when she hits 30...
Posted Wed Apr 08, 2009 10:36 AM
Still, not all women experience a dive in their sex drive after they marry or move in with their SO. May I say that the times it's gotten better, at least for me, it's when my SO has truly enjoyed being and doing things with me all the time, when I've had a good social life besides the couple life, when I felt I had the liberty of being what I want to be without restrictions, when he's known what my dreams are and has allowed me and helped me to pursue them, and just in general by him knowing the little things that please me on a day to day basis. Now, that would have me turned on to the max on a permanent basis.
OP, you stated the reasons why you love your girlfriend, could it be that you're not completely aware of what she truly needs... just asking...
Posted Wed Apr 08, 2009 10:48 AM
Posted Wed Apr 08, 2009 03:13 PM
Posted Wed Apr 08, 2009 07:17 PM
Birth control aside, all of the suggestions made above are quite good! I definitely think that taking a break from initiating sex is a good strategy in the short term, but I think it is likely that she may not know what her true turn ons are yet.
I'm not sure what her sexual experience is, but she is fairly young and I would bet that there are things that would trigger her horniness - it's just a matter of identifying what they are. The best way to find that out is be open communication and a little trial and error (which can be lots of fun!).
And while this is total cliche, it's true - foreplay goes a LONG way! Try to set the mood with romantic ambience, hugging, kissing, massage, general intimacy. Follow through with some gentle fondling, and take your time. She might just need to have some attention in other areas before going to full-on sex.
I once received invaluable advice from a woman - think of an amount of time you think would be reasonable for foreplay and then multiply that by 3.
I hope that helps!