Monogomy is it a thing of the past
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 07:56 AM
Is it a sexuall thing, do marriages end because of sex and temptations to eat out.
What do u guys think.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 08:03 AM
people want new things, women want new cocks, men want fresh pussy and troubles are caused because of the inability for them to diversify there sex lives.
either that or people have kids and then just hate their lives.
i think its definitley a sexual thing. sometimes i find my thoughts wandering like that, i even look at BDSM community personals (if im gonna cheat i want it to be worth it i suppose... but i never have and i wont), but i mostly just get horny and get off of work and go have some fun with my girl.
if you can direct your temptations and realize you have everything you want already, but just have to put it to use.. things dont have to end. like i said, whenever i feel promiscuous and think about cheating, i realize i have a beautiful girlfriend and i should just talk to her if theres a problem or i'm unhappy. we usually resolve it.
the real problem lies where people just get sick of each other and permeate feelings that would cause the other to not even want to be around them. sometimes i can feel when my girlfriends attitude is obviously indicating she doesnt want to see me right now, so i back off and go hang out with my brother or go to the gym and work out way too hard in frustration.
people need a vent and it can't be their spouse or children. and its not gonna be their boss or co-workers. so people let it build up and break down.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 08:17 AM
The only thing that changed is that today divorced people don't end up socially dead and you don't need to poison your spouse or drown them in the water well, you can just divorce them.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 08:36 AM
Yeah, that's my point, I love to be married, can't live single and it took 36 years to find my Adele, now I trust I'm set till I die.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 08:56 AM
its fucked up to see people get married at 18-19, have a kid and get divorced at 20. and i've seen it too much.
i can't say i'd propose to my girlfriend given different circumstances. we have too many obstructions and i wouldnt jump into a marriage thinking everything would dissolve. its fucked up to say i wouldnt marry my current girlfriend, but as it and SHE stands now, i dont know about it. I am hopeful for change, and change will come as she matures and starts college i hope. dont get me wrong i love her to death, but thinking smart, no i wouldnt do it right now.
then again, i also tamed the un-tame-able in a short amount of time. im too mature for my age and shes slightly immature for her age, but things have progressed amazingly since day 1.
then again who is to say she wont change for the worse, which i have a feeling COULD happen when she starts school this fall. i hope not, but i will know what to do when the time comes. it'll just break me heart though but hey thats life huh.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 09:46 AM
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 11:22 AM
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 11:28 AM
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 01:10 PM
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 02:08 PM
Just my opinion anyway....
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 02:43 PM
I pity a couple going through divorce or a relationship that doesn't work out. When you start splitting up stuff with any kind of unfriendly atmosphere, the only one that wins is the lawyer. I would guess in many cases, that financial difficulties ( not necessarily poverty) but squabbles over money starts the trouble and sexual desire/ conquest crutches the void.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 02:59 PM
communication is key to a healthy relationship, and technology is one of those distractions that ironically gets in the way of that by making it way too easy to access one of the many other readily available outlets
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 05:36 PM
More and more people are moving away from the traditional molds and women are becoming careerists. It's not a bad thing, but it creates a sense of "ownership" over who earns what.
Money is the root of over 80% of divorces.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 06:08 PM
Money is the root of over 80% of divorces.
...for marriages that happened with money in mind...
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 06:44 PM
Money can be an issue. However, its one that can be easily solved in my eyes. If I stay with my girlfriend and we get married she will be better educated than myself. However, her earning potential out of college will be about 50% of what mine is likely to be.
For the longest time this caused an issue for me, but we feel that we have come up with a decent solution. Whatever portion of her income she wants to allocate to the household will be matched by me and thats what we will live on. That way no one has ownership issues on who bought what. This is currently low we live in out apartment, and seems to work great. (although I dont have a job)
Is it perfect, no. Will it need refinement, certainty. But communication is the key when it comes to personal finances. But, it doesnt stop the mind from getting bored.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 10:14 PM
I have friends who married young and have a great marriage. Marriage is love, honor and respect, and living up to your commitment.
Posted Wed Jul 15, 2009 11:41 PM
"We" (note: he's NOT here on SF cuz he's got NO sex drive) just celibrated our 27th anniversary (that's not counting 5 years of dating before marriage).
So whassup with that? huh?
From where I sit, it seems that each individual has their own path to travel in this life. And some people reach out and crave and strive and continue to grow and learn though out the life time, it's as if they need new experiences. But some other folk get tired, give up, grow complacent, are satisfied, and see no need to go any further than their own living room for any and all satisfaction.
And herein lies the marital dilemma. What happens of you think you've found the perfect mate but decades (or a few short years) later you discover this irreconsiable difference in your personalities????
1) communicate honestly and stay together, each livin within their own bubble?
2) go your separate ways?
Posted Thu Jul 16, 2009 03:59 AM
I married for life also. Unfortunately the girl I married didn't!