Is it ok to cheat, or should i dump my partner. Want a FMM threesome but hes not interested, what should I do?
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 09:56 AM
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 10:21 AM
doesnt sound like you care too much for him in the first instance so I'd say, set the guy free to meet someone that will care for him.
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 11:07 AM
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 11:20 AM
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 11:34 AM
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 11:50 AM
So because he didnt want a threesome, you'd rather cheat or dump him .(She asked is it ok to cheat or should she dump him)
The fact that you even asked tells me that you really don't give a shit about him. (how do we know how she feels?)
Forgive me if im wrong as there's no offence intended to either of you, im only saying how your posts have made me feel, but i thought when i joined this site it was a place to meet, identify with, explore our oppisites, and look for genuine positive feedback to our dilemma's in our sex lives, some of us dont have all the answers if we did why would we come on here and ask your (people) opinion's.
With that said, i think you (origional poster) should sit and discuss how you feel with your partner, he seems like the type of guy whos happy with what he's got, you on the other hand are not. You want to experience life and all its riches. If you sit and talk you'll both know what you want, if you feel talking would go nowhere then mabey its time to move on, why stay in a condemmed relationship as you now know you want more from your sex life.
I would not advise anybody to cheat as this will cause hurt and no individual deserves the pain caused by the deceit.
Be honest with yourself, and i believe you are as you would not have posted here asking for peoples opinion's on what you should do if you werent.
Good luck in your final decission whatever it may be.
This post has been edited by bell end: Thu May 27, 2010 11:52 AM
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 11:54 AM
I agree with you Ball End, except this. The title of the topic she started is "Is it ok to cheat, or should I dump my partner." Telling me, she did say that. Just clarifying
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 11:57 AM
This is the Dutchess i have got to know since joining, a straight to the point honest answer.
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 11:58 AM
So because he didnt want a threesome, you'd rather cheat or dump him .(She never said she wanted to dump him)
Look at the thread title, sorry but she gave us two choices to choose from, dump or cheat. True she has more than 2 choices, she can cheat, dump, talk with / settle, etc. but she presented this thread with only two. From that we can deduce that she is more interested in cheating / dumping than working a way around this. After all had she been more interested in ways to convince him to do it the thread may have been titled "How to get him to threesome" or some such.
It's assumed given the nature of the post, either way your right we don't know how she feels, so yes her feelings should be left out until more than an assumption can be made.
So to the OP, my suggestion is talk to him about it, outside of a party & spur of the moment setting and see if a middle ground can be reached. If it can't you have to decide what's in it for you and why or why not stay. Perhaps there are greener pastures for both of you out there. Just don't be so quick & ready to throw in the towel.
HTH and keep us posted.
This post has been edited by Pelvis Rodman: Thu May 27, 2010 12:00 PM
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 11:59 AM
I did missword my previous reply and have changed it. T.Y
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 12:04 PM
I kinda wonder if his reservations weren't so much an act of being prude or jealous as scared, worried and WTF-ness of being asked out of the blue mere minutes before the situation would have taken place. It may be entirely different if the shock value is removed from the situation and a more open conversation took place at home/dinner.
Posted Thu May 27, 2010 10:53 PM
Posted Fri May 28, 2010 12:08 AM
Posted Fri May 28, 2010 02:42 AM
when you phrase a question like that, you open yourself up to being judged.
you asked for her opinion and she gave it to you.
Posted Fri May 28, 2010 08:27 AM
you asked for her opinion and she gave it to you.
Exactly, it's an ultimatum, its either you cheat or you dump him. Sorry I hurt your feelings, i'm even sorry-er for the man who you're doing this to. My post was removed because it was offensive, but cheat vs dump is offensive. This site brings rationality and an outsiders view to a topic. None of this displays a health relationship or a caring and loving individual. And FYI I tried to remove the hostility from my post, but clearly that wasn't enough, imagine how hostile I really was sitting behind my computer reading that. It's one of the worst things i've read around here. In the relationship forums, we talk about positive ways of dealing with issues, and our solution is ALWAYS 1) TALK AND COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR PARTNER ... or 2) END IT!
nobody is going to condone cheating here. it's wrong. it's unfair. it's one of the many problems with society, it's why the divorce rate is ridiculous. It's why so many kids grow up without fathers/mothers. It's a motivating factor behind suicides, homicides, alcoholism, developing drug addictions, clinical depression, ED/PE with future partners, spread of STD/i's, as well as general violence including assaults,robberies, thefts.. blackmailing and revenge.. the list goes on and on.
understanding human psychology isn't an easy thing, but it's easy enough to understand the cause/effect relationship between Cheating and a mountain of consequences brought on by irrational thought processes and temporary loss of mental control. "Fight or flight" kicks in, given said news, and unfortunately, more people fight than flight (including me).
This post has been edited by Duchess: Fri May 28, 2010 10:36 AM
Posted Fri May 28, 2010 10:39 AM
There is no point in anyone else leaving comments as everything that can be said, has been said!
It sometimes is the case where asking a question leads to answers that you don't like and that is the risk of posting a question and asking for others opinions.
Thank you all for your comments and participation