Posted Thu Nov 11, 2010 05:26 PM
what are female members thoughts about sex with overweight guys?
Posted Thu Nov 11, 2010 06:44 PM
Anyway, my opinion is that I have no opinion, lol. I have a preference for sporty guys, who tend not to be overweight; however, I've been attracted to men with some meat in the past. I think the more pressing issue is if the guy being overweight makes him feel less confident. In which case the confidence issue is what's likely holding him back and not necessarily the weight.
This post has been edited by cocoa70: Thu Nov 11, 2010 06:45 PM
Posted Thu Nov 11, 2010 07:00 PM
I myself have a wide variety of preferences, and two of the more particular ones include: shorter than me, but athletic latino men or quite tall and somewhat slim men with blue eyes, but only if they have glasses. On *any* man of any age, I have a weakness for dimples and devilish grins.
Meanwhile, my ex sister in law, who is a knock-out, very petite girl has a major, major preference for much bigger, very husky men, as long as they have deep voices.
Granted, even given the particular preferences women have, a wicked sense of humour and radiant confidence will often win over looks.
A close friend of mine is a very big guy, but he's an actor, so his charm and charisma have resulted in him *always* dating a good looking girl.
Figure out what about you makes you distinctive, interesting, and worth talking to and develop that and refine it until there's no way women can resist getting to know you.
Posted Thu Nov 11, 2010 08:30 PM
I am a petite girl at 5'3" and maybe 110 pounds, and my man, as many people on here know is Dale and he is 5'8"ish and 200+ pounds, i love him regardless and as long as he is happy i am happy.
In some cases it can become an issue, if being overweight starts to effect daily tasks and makes it hard for someone to get up and walk around the house then it starts to be a problem for me cause it limits the activities they can take part of and it also plays a big role on your health. A lot of people don't want to end up in a relationship that in a few years they are having to play nurse to someone who is way overweight and cant do things, or someone who may develop diabetes, and cardiovascular disorders all because they didn't take proper care of themselves.
If Dale's health started to suffer because of his size then i would talk to him about options to be healthier.
Posted Thu Nov 11, 2010 09:00 PM
While i'm not a woman, I do observe a lot and talk a lot to them ;-) I agree with things both Bellalla and Lover of Dale said.. Ask ten women what their tastes and preferences are, and you'll get twenty different answers. But even the ones who do say weight is an issue, if you ask them to explain, it will often come down to a health issue, not an appearance issue.. although some women simply get creeped out by the "flab".. But truth is, no matter what your appearance or personality, you can't make every woman on earth want you--As the saying goes, you can't please everyone all the time. All-in-all though, most women I know don't really consider weight when considering a man, unless he's so overweight that he's a health risk--they want to know that they won't be burying the man they fall in love within the next five years.
I am 5'4" and weigh in at 165 pounds. That's 35 pounds over my ideal weight for my body type. Yet I rarely have problems finding women who are attracted to me--whether it's a friendly attraction or a more intimate attraction. But I also remember many years ago when I often felt the same as I think you're feeling now--why can't I find someone? Is it my weight? My looks? What I found out was that the true problem was.. That I felt that way and asked those questions. A lack of self-confidence. Same as cocoa had said.
I'd say rather than asking if you being overweight is attractive or not, ask yourself why you're asking. Why does it matter? If you don't like yourself, can you change or fix what you don't like? If not, can you at least come to terms with it and accept it? Don't worry so much about what others think when it comes to you--what YOU think of yourself is what matters most. It'll show in everything you do, from the way you look at people--do you look them in the eyes, or shy away and look at your feet? To the way you express yourself in body language--Do you cross your arms and roll your shoulders together, giving the message "no trespassing?"
Ultimately, what it comes down to is this.. If you don't feel there is something about you worth loving, how can anyone else ever feel that way? Think of yourself as a salesman.. Would you buy a car from someone who said "Buy this car, it really sucks and will break down on you five minutes out of the lot," or would you buy the car from the guy who was really enthusiastic about the car, had one himself, and feels it's the best car he ever owned?
Posted Thu Nov 11, 2010 09:07 PM
Posted Thu Nov 11, 2010 09:21 PM
Its not the only thing that attracts me but if there was a line up of men in front of me from skinny to big and I was told to pick one, I would def pick the bigger
Posted Fri Nov 12, 2010 05:12 AM
look for Daniel Craig.
But, thankfully, it doesn't happen like that. You get a chance to know the guy,
to flirt. And then, appearance is secondary. Sometimes you even don't know
the guy, but he's got something that takes your fancy.
The man I find the sexiest in the whole world is obese, a violinist called
edit: the problem is if the guy doesn't even give you a chance to get to know him,
because he's too shy.
This post has been edited by alien2: Fri Nov 12, 2010 05:13 AM
Posted Fri Nov 12, 2010 11:59 AM
In my opinion in very few cases are there excuses for being obese and I find it quite unattractive. We're talking OBESITY here though, I am not in the least bit shallow. I myself have been overweight at points in my life, and still slightly am if you want to go by BMI.
Even when I was at my heaviest, I was active. I had some health problems but I was fit by most standards. I have had horses my whole life. I need a man who can lift hay bales, jump on horseback, etc. If he can't, well... then there is a big gap that in my opinion cannot be bridged.
The guy that I fell hardest for in my life was overweight when I met him. He lost some during the course of our relationship but had a belly and manboobs still. I still ravished him like there was no tomorrow because I loved him! If he was 500 lb's I wouldn't have looked at him twice, though.
So, I guess what i'm getting at is - overweight can mean many things. So yes, and no is my answer. lol
Posted Wed Feb 16, 2011 05:44 PM
Posted Wed Feb 16, 2011 05:58 PM
Of course the best option would be to clean up your diet more, and find a more solid workout plan that caters to your needs and goals. It would help tremendously to know what you feel might hold you back, but I totally understand if you want to keep it private.
This post has been edited by mr_curve: Wed Feb 16, 2011 06:01 PM
Posted Wed Feb 16, 2011 08:14 PM
Seriously, the one real problem of being overweight is that it may affect your confidence. One's worth isn't decided over their weight calculation, for God's sake! As long as you get used to having some confidence you'll be ok
Posted Wed Feb 16, 2011 09:10 PM
I'm short, yes, 5'4" and I'm on the fairly plump side, so I prefer guys on the plump side...my current big name crush is the front singer for Rehab...man oh man is he hot...on the other hand I've had a crush on dr. house for years (it's the blue eyes and that attitude!). I prefer a guy to be taller and bigger then I am. they don't have to be 6'8" or anything, but four or five inches is good for me...
My current fuck buddy has to be somewhere around 6' and while he's not a lot overweight, he sure doesn't work out all day either (all the walking home from the bar must keep him from getting too big of a beer belly, and yes that was a joke!). He's not...fit...but then neither am I!
Posted Wed Feb 16, 2011 09:09 PM
Posted Thu Feb 17, 2011 10:51 AM
Spontaneous sex can be harder with a big belly as missionary sex can become more uncomfortable.
Choosing to not eat the last bite of food off of a plate at every meal will cause a person to lose an extra 15-25+lbs a year.
Taking a walk the length of a footbal field and back every day will lengthen an otherwise inactive person's life by years.
Posted Thu Feb 17, 2011 11:32 AM
You mentioned "depression". Physical activity, losing weight, etc. can help with that, too.
I gained weight at some point in my life and on top of feeling worse mentally and not being so "lively" and able to do certain physical things, I also noticed that flirting with women and their checking me out in the street became less frequent or non existing as before when I had a more athletic figure.
After coming back in shape the reactions of females changed again, no matter if it was just a clerk in the bank, post office, baker, girls at concerts in the club, etc. The reactions changed very obviously, but if that is really important is another question.
I think it's the same as we look at the girls. I like curves, but up from a certain weight it starts to distort the figure - proportions and facial expression and features (that differs from person to person) that we find "attractive". I know some quite chubby sexy girls, but some would be much more sexy if a bit less obese. I think it has to do with the subconscious connecting of the physical appearance with health and ability in the possible partner. What looks strong and healthy also looks sexy to us - on average, I guess. There are some big guys that are attractive, but really obese guys tend to look unhealthy and less "able" physically and that is probably unattractive to females at the first sight. When your personality comes into play is another thing, but it helps in everyday relations to use the advantage of a nice first impression, too.
I wouldn't want to make you worry about your appearance out of vanity, but I would encourage you to do something for your body - "Mens sana in corpore sano"
I think people don't realize how easy it is to come into shape if you don't expect immediate results and after you make the first step - firm decision to CHANGE and maintain the strong will. Live and eat!! healthy, do some sport and regular exercises and you will feel and look better.