Will my vagina adjust?
Posted Mon Jun 06, 2011 08:58 PM
Posted Mon Jun 06, 2011 09:17 PM
Hope to hear you're having better sex soon!
Posted Mon Jun 06, 2011 10:32 PM
Posted Mon Jun 06, 2011 10:47 PM
I am kind of a large guy. My lady was very tight when we first met. It was really uncomfortable for her for a while until we finally figured out how to make it easier. First of all RELAX, the pain has probably conditioned you to expect it to hurt...anticipation of pain will make you tighten up and make it worse. Second use alot of lube and invest time in alot of foreplay to get your own juices going. Try different positions. Every woman's vagina is different and will be tipped different ways. Use toys of different sizes to have orgasms and work up to the largest ones, not so much to stretch yourself but just to get used to larger things in you.
Vaginas are amazing things, yours has the capacity to stretch to incredible dimensions, way bigger than his cock. It's all a matter of relaxing, conditioning, being aroused, being wet and over coming the anxiety. Last but not least you don't have to fuck to feel good. Oral, clit and g spot massage are all great ways to recieve pleasure and make him be a little more patient with you; he needs to learn to cater to your needs.
Posted Tue Jun 07, 2011 10:03 AM
I agree with a lot of what the others have said.
You should know that it's not as simple as "stretching it out" because the vagina is very elastic and will not stay stretched out permanently. The only thing that might have a significant affect on how tight you are could be childbirth, which is major trauma to your vagina. However, even after going through childbirth, there are pelvic floor muscle exercises that can make a woman just as tight or tighter than she was before childbirth, so even that won't permanently stretch your vagina. The vagina can take a lot of punishment, and there are men out there who flatter themselves into thinking they have such large penises that it "won't fit" inside you or it's "too big" to go all the way in. A larger penis might look intimidating, but there's no reason why sex with a man who's larger can't be very enjoyable. It's not so much that your vagina will adjust over time but that your attitude and his and how you go about penetration will adjust. Once you both learn how he needs to enter you, you'll be able to do it every time without worrying about feeling pain. It's more of a mindset and experimenting because your vagina really won't change and become less tight over time. Just having sex, even with a larger man, or using toys, even if you do it excessively, won't stretch out your vagina.
Relaxation is, I think, one of the most important things. If you aren't relaxed, you could be squeezing or tensing your vaginal muscles, especially if you believe that penetration will hurt. As tenyn said, you'll anticipate it being painful and won't be able to relax and let him slide inside you. The other most important thing is to use lube if you need to. Even though my guy and I have been having sex for almost five years, penetration can still be uncomfortable if I'm not wet enough. When I'm very wet, he can slide inside in one thrust, but if I'm not wet enough and there's too much friction, it can be uncomfortable. Not necessarily painful, but it's definitely not the pleasurable feeling I want. So use lube if you need to. For vaginal sex, I'd recommend a water-based lube because it's good for use with condoms and toys, and silicone lube is more difficult to clean up. I really only use silicone-based lube for anal sex because the anus doesn't self-lubricate like the vagina does. There's really no way to tell you how long it will take for penetration to become comfortable for you. It's different for every woman. Not only that, but it's also different with each partner, so the things you've tried before with other partners may not work in this case, and even though you may have been able to have sex with smaller men than your current partner a lot more easily, it could take a while for you to become comfortable with this guy. Only time will tell how long it's going to take. Nobody here can give you that answer.
As far as being on top, if he's getting "stuck," then maybe he's hitting your cervix? I'm not really sure on this one as I've never been with a larger man. I'm also not a huge fan of being on top. I'm hoping that some of the other female members will have some advice here.
Posted Tue Jun 07, 2011 09:01 PM
Then, yes... It's very likely that you'll get adjusted to your boyfriend's size the more you have sex with him. In fact, it's not that your vagina changes at all, but the familiarity will cause your mind to feel less anxious about intercourse... I've had this experience in the past. I have gone from a smaller one, to big, to medium and so on. Your vagina should adjust for the most part. Childbirth helps I guess, but I had my children through C-sections, so it's not that that did much for me.
The most important thing that will make the difference is mindset. Whenever you approach sex you have to feel like you want it with your mind as much as with your body. Okay, you've been experiencing pain, but that doesn't have to be that way. Maybe look at it as a challenge and try to conquer it rather than something that's being done to you. The idea is that you should never initiate intercourse until you're begging your boyfriend for it.
Posted Wed Jun 08, 2011 05:53 AM
melgk21 im omahajim59 I have a large penis too.I have to be gentle I let my girl control the depth.I have 7.5 inches and can hit her cervix very easily and that's when she tells me to ease back a little.you can go to my gallery and see my erect penis to get a prospective.thanks.
Posted Wed Jun 08, 2011 10:41 AM
Posted Wed Jun 08, 2011 11:24 AM
I'm gonna guess your ob/gyn has checked you for things like fibroids and cysts, if not you might wanna get that done.
Posted Fri Jun 10, 2011 08:10 AM
Posted Sat Jun 11, 2011 08:31 PM
Posted Fri Jun 24, 2011 07:59 AM
Like everyone has said, foreplay, plenty of lube and use of toys such as dildo's and vibrators are all great, but don't underestimate fingers! Ask him to use his fingers on you, starting with one, then two, etc... this will a) stimulate you, thus naturally lubricate you and allows you to get used to the feeling of a certain size before stepping it up a notch, it's the best "warm up" technique I know of and actually came recommended from my doctor after my operation. And don't be afraid to use lube on his fingers if you're finding you're not wet enough naturally.
Best of luck to you mel!
Posted Wed Aug 31, 2011 06:58 PM
Posted Wed Aug 31, 2011 07:06 PM
Posted Thu Sep 01, 2011 02:02 AM
it might be more a mental thing
Posted Thu Sep 01, 2011 10:28 AM
Posted Mon Sep 05, 2011 01:44 PM
Posted Mon Sep 05, 2011 02:17 PM